Sakura In Paris
by Ms. Raye Sinic
Summary: Sakura goes to Paris to visit her grandmother; and when Madison can't go, can Kero survive with what happens when Li comes instead?
1. Default Chapter

Sakura in Paris  
Part One: The Letter  
  
Hello! This is Raye, the wacky-hacky!  
This is my fanfic.  
And as such, I will be ticked if anyone steals or copies it without my permission.  
Scratch that.  
I won't be ticked.  
I'll be pissed!  
Anyway, this is one of my Cardcaptors fics, and I hope you like it.  
Sakura: Why wouldn't they?  
I'll be dropping in at the begining and ending of each chapter to have little conversations with my pals and anime friends. If you like, just ignore them. It's just my brain screaming out.  
My friends are as follows:  
Max (The anime hater) also fondly referred to as Fluffy.  
Ms. Sinic (loves anime almost as much as yours truly) also known as Nuget.  
Psycho (the craziest one) also known as Chris.  
Ameoba Boy (the annoying guy), brother to the Thing.  
Raye (me! the great writer!) also known as Ange, Bar, and Ms. Bookworm.  
Notes: Thinking   
" " Talking and Quotes  
{ } Author's Notes.  
Enjoy!   
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I don't own Cardcaptors or its characters. Clamp does.  
I didn't create Cardcaptors or its characters. Clamp did.  
I'm just writing this for fun, and because I'm a writer.  
And as a writer, I write things. Duh.  
  
  
  
Sakura yawned as she shuffled down the stairs.  
"Morning, Squirt."  
Sakura shot a Devil Glare at Tori. "Don't try me."  
Sakura's dad walks into the room, looking through a handful of letters and ads that just came in the mail.  
"Oh, Sakura. Looks like you got a letter from Grannie Marie." Dad said as he handed the pink, heavily-perfumed letter to Sakura. Sakura sighed as she looked down at the fancy cursive writing.  
"To Madamoiselle Sakura?"  
"You know how your grandmother is. Humor her." Dad said as he sat down to a plate of pancakes.  
Sakura tore open the thick envelope and pulled out expensive writing paper.  
"Read it out loud, Squirt. I love it when Grannie embarrasses you."  
Sakura glared at Tori again and read the letter to herself.  
  
Dear Sakura,  
I know you must be busy for your summer vacation, but here in dear old Paris, it gets quite lonely for an old Madame like myself. I would love it if you could make the long journey to Paris and visit with me for the summer. You know that I am an old woman, and can not hope for too many more years to spend with you. It would do my heart good to see a pretty young thing like yourself in the most beautiful city in the world, Paris, where you deserve to be. You could be in your element here, surrounded by beautiful things and handsome young men all vieing for your attention. Please tell me you'll come!  
Enclosed is two tickets for Paris. Please come soon, and bring a little friend. I await your answer and arrival.  
  
Love from Sweet Paris,  
The Madame Marie De'la Genne`  
  
Sakura sighed. "Why does she always have to put the guilt trip on me?"  
"So you'll go, dear. You know, she does make a point. And it is a wonderful place to visit, Paris is. Why don't you go?" Dad suggested.  
Sakura sighed wistfully, thinking of all the things she had been planning on doing that summer. She sighed again. She was even going to try and gather enough courage to tell Li .....  
"I'll go, but only if I find someone to go with me."  
  
  
So do ya like it? It's not that good, but I'm hoping that it'll get better as it goes on.  
And you know, Paris is the City of Love ....  
Ms. Sinic: And you tell me not to give away hints ...  
Raye: Awww ...  
Max: You guys are both beyond sad.  
Both: AND YOU'RE NOT?!?!?  
Max (cringes.): Forget it.  
Raye: Ameoba Boy, what's the matter?  
Ameoba Boy: I ....I ......I think I saw something ....  
Psycho: Something? Like what something?  
Ameoba Boy: ....Like a .....Like a ....  
Psycho (grinning devilishly): Like a ....Ghost?  
(Ameoba Boy whimpers and dives under the couch)  
Sakura: Ghosts?!?!!?  
(Sakura joins Ameoba Boy. The couch is now trembling violently)  
Li (Sweatdrops): Sakura .....  
Psycho: I wouldn't go under there if I were you ...  
Both: Wh ....Why .....why not?  
Psycho: Chucky likes his personal space.  
(Sakura and Ameoba Boy are now hanging from the fan on the ceiling. Everyone sweatdrops)  
Raye: Please! Next chapter! Come and save us! *(-_-)*  
  



	2. Sakura In Paris ch.2

Sakura in Paris  
Part Two: The Decision  
  
Hello again. I am your author Raye Barry, and I am in the nuthouse known as my life.  
Psycho: Heee hee!  
Ameoba Boy: I...I...I think I see something again....  
Sakura: Eeeeekkk!!!  
(Sakura jumps into Li's arms {imagine Scooby and Shaggy in Scooby Doo}.)  
(Li sweatdrops, but can't help blushing and looking pleased.)  
Max: For crying out loud.....  
Heaven: I'm gonna watch the Mummy! Who wants to watch it with me?  
Everyone: ME!  
Raye: We shall now take a short break from this nuthouse for the next fic part.  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I do not own Cardcaptors, Clamp does.  
My hat, (If I had one) goes off to you talented ladies!  
Note: Riding on a giant lawnmower through a ballroom full of war-painted turtles is quite a fun way of passing the time ..... (^-^)  
  
  
Sakura picked up the phone. Kero floated over to her on his back, a giant lollipop held in both hands. He was struggling to fit the entire thing in his mouth at one time.  
"Wot're ooo oing?"  
Sakura dialed a number. "I'm gonna call Madison and see if she can go with me to Paris."  
"Ooo! Pearish! Ev've got ummy ood dere!"  
The phone rang three times before someone picked it up.  
"Hello?"  
It wasn't someone Sakura recognized, so she guessed it had to be a maid.  
"Uh, hello? Is Madison there?"  
"Yes, one moment please."  
Smooth jazz played in the background. Sakura nodded her head in time to the music. That's how bored she was. It was suddenly interrupted.  
"Hello?"  
"Madison! It's me, Sakura. Listen, my Grannie Marie sent me two tickets to Paris, because she wants me to come and spend the summer with her. She said I could bring a friend. Do you wanna come?"  
Madison sighed sadly. "I'd love to, but I can't. I'm going with my mom on a business trip to Australia in a week. I'm sorry."  
Sakura sighed. "That's okay. I'll just see if someone else can. Bye, Madison."  
"Bye."  
Kero's head was strangely shaped because of the lollipop in his mouth. His head was now bigger than his body, and a flat, circle shape.  
Sakura giggled as she dialed another number.  
  
An hour later:  
Sakura frowned in despair. No one could go. Chelsea and Nikki, and even Rita were all going to summer camp in two days. There was no one else she could call. Unless....  
The phone rang for a long while. Sixth ring, seventh ring, eighth ring....  
"Hello?"  
"Uh, hi."  
"Who is this?"  
"Sakura."  
Li stared at the phone piece, wondering why she had called him. Did she have something important to tell him?  
"Li? You still there?"  
"Uh, yeah. What'd you call for, Sakura?"  
"I wanted to ask you something."  
"What?"  
"My Grandma sent me two tickets to Paris, and she wants me to come and spend the summer there with her. She said I could bring a friend. Would you like to go?"  
Li was taken aback. Was he hearing correctly? Was the girl he loved with all his heart asking him to go to the City of Love? For three months? Alone?!?!  
"Sure."  
Sakura grinned. "Thanks! Talk to you later about the details! Bye!"  
Li hung up grinning. Maybe he could find the courage to tell her ...  
Sakura sighed happily. Maybe she could find the courage to tell him...  
  
  
Did ya like that part? It was better than last time.  
Mostly 'cause Li was in it ....  
(Uncontrolled Drooling)  
Sakura: Hey! Don't think about my boyfriend like that!  
(Li stares open-mouthed at Sakura. )  
Li: (In an unbelieving voice) I'm your boyfriend?  
(Sakura blushes, and is saved by the bell. Door bell, that is.)  
Raye: Ameoba Boy, go get the door.  
Ameoba Boy: Be back in a nip!  
(Ameoba Boy opens the door and screams)  
Ameoba Boy: AHHHHHHHHHHH! IT'S THE BLAIR WITCH!!  
Psycho: Cousin Blair!  
Blair Witch: Cousin Psycho!  
(The two witches hug.)  
(Ameoba Boy is still running around the room screaming)  
Raye: Uh, on to the next part .....(-_-)  
  



	3. Sakura In Paris ch.3

Sakura in Paris  
Part Three: The Plans  
  
So, for all of you unbelievers and not-pay-attentioners, the Blair Witch is now in our midst.  
Psycho: When I called you at the woods, Bigfoot took my message and I was afraid that he wouldn't tell you I called!  
Blair Witch: Aww, Foot's just a big softy. One little poke with the right butcher knife, and he'll tell ya anything...  
Max: Uh, hi there.  
Blair Witch: Hello dear. Would you like a manicure? I'm very good at those. All my clients start screaming with happiness when I'm done.  
Max (sidling away nervously): Uh, no thank you.  
Heaven: The Mummy is starting! (She was fast-forwarding through the commercials)  
(Ameoba Boy finally collapses in exhaustion after being the first person to ever run a 14,274 mile long race without stopping.)  
Ameoba Boy (Panting and out of breath): I'm gonna take a nap now. (Passes out)  
(Sakura and Li join Heaven on the couch and start watching the movie. Everyone else joins them.)  
Psycho: I love the moss you put in your hair....  
Blair Witch: Thanks, dear. It so matches with the dried blood...  
(Everyone edges away nervously.)  
Raye: Quiet! The fic's starting........  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I do not own Cardcaptors.  
Clamp does.  
There!  
You happy!?!  
I said it!  
JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!  
(Runs off sobbing)  
  
  
  
"So, our plane leaves on Saturday, so that gives you three days to get ready, and I hope you don't mind doing this for me Li. This really means a lot to me, you willing to spend your vacation with me instead of having fun here."  
Li was very aware at how close Sakura was, sitting right next to him on the couch. Having fun here? What was she talking about? A whole summer away from Meilin, with the real one he loved? He was in Heaven. Pure and simple.  
"Oh, I don't mind. I don't mind at all Sakura. I'm glad I could help you out."  
Sakura blushed and ducked her head. She glanced quickly over at him. He was so close... And they were alone...... She wished she could just tell him now about her feelings for him...  
"What's the Brat doing in here!"  
Sakura sighed. Her ideal moment was over. She looked up at the fuming, glaring Kero.  
"Finished with that lollipop already?"  
"Don't try and change the subject! What is it, doing here!?"  
Li glared at Kero. "It is here because Sakura invited it over."  
Sakura nodded. "He's going with us to Paris, Kero."  
"WHAT?!?!?!?!"  
Kero froze in midair, his mouth hanging wide open. "Does your dad know?!?!"  
"Yeah! Dad said it was fine, seeing as how we're almost always gonna be with Grannie Marie or Jacque." (Jacque was Grannie Marie's butler, and a good friend of Sakura's)  
"I don't believe that! I can't believe that! I won't believe that!"  
"Too bad. I'm coming, and there's nothing you can do about it." Li said. He and Kero began a glaring contest.  
Burst into flames! Make his head burst into flames! Kero fumed inwardly.  
Sakura sighed and pulled Kero out of the air by his tail. Kero squeaked in surprise.  
"Li's right. There's nothing you can do to make him stay here. And you both are going to get along, even if I have to lock both of you in suitcases! Is that clear?!"  
Kero mumbled something sounding like a yes, and Li nodded. Anything for you, Sakura.  
"Great! Well, we'll see you on Saturday at the airport at 10:00! Bye, Li!"  
Sakura opened the door. Li walked reluctantly into the night.  
"Bye, Sakura."  
"Bye, Li."  
Sakura reluctantly closed the door and sighed. She wished Li could have stayed the whole night.  
  
  
Max: I was just wondering, how old are they?  
Raye: 14, almost 15.  
Max: R.i.i.i.i.g.h.t.  
Ameoba Boy: Oww! I've got a crick in my neck!  
Li (very snidely): What did ya expect? When you fall in a heap and pass out just because a homicidal devilwitch showed up at the front door, that kind of stuff's gonna happen.  
Sakura: ex-nay on the evilwitch-day.....  
Blair Witch: I brought munchies if anyone wants some!  
Ameoba Boy (warily): What'd ya bring?  
Blair Witch: Ladyfingers!  
(Everyone begins retching and runs for cover.)  
Psycho: (Picking up one of the meat and lettuce wrapped hor`de vours) What's gotten into them?  
(Blair Witch shrugs and the two witches continue watching the Mummy in an empty room...) 


	4. Sakura In Paris ch.4

Sakura in Paris  
Part Four: The Arrival at Paris  
  
(The group comes crawling on hands and knees back into the room.)  
Raye (Whispering to Ameoba Boy): Is the coast clear?  
Ameoba Boy: I donknow! You go see!  
(Raye, Heaven, Max, Li, and Sakura look at each other and nod. Ameoba Boy is forcibly picked up and thrown into the room.)  
Ameoba Boy: Oww!  
(Psycho and the Blair Witch look up.)  
Psycho: Hey, Ameoba Boy! C'mon, the movie's getting to a good part.  
(Ameoba Boy gulps and waves the others in.)  
Raye (Whispering): We're gonna try and survive the next few hours! Meanwhile, enjoy my next fanfic part!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I don't own Cardcaptors, Clamp does.  
Short and sweet's the ticket.  
  
  
Sakura was bouncing up and down in her plane seat. "I can see the Eiffel Tower!"  
Li was trying very hard to calm her down and keep his lunch at the same time. The sight of a bouncing Sakura was very upsetting to him.  
"Calm down Sakura! We're starting to land!"  
Kero snickered from his spot in Sakura's bookbag, hanging from the overhead compartment, at the sight of such and uncomfortable Li. "Serves the Brat right..."  
The plane bumped down, and all of the suitcases, and several very heavy ones there were, slammed into Kero. As they rolled away again, a very angry Kero was squashed flat.  
"Ow."  
  
"Look! There's Jacque!" Sakura exclaimed as she walked down the staircase. She grabbed Li's hand and pulled him along after her. Li was too busy preventing himself from falling to be happy about the slight contact.  
Kero groaned. "I don't feel so good.... Maybe I shouldn't have eaten that Twinkie....."  
Jacque grinned and bowed politely to the laughing Sakura, who was still holding Li's hand.  
"Chere`! 'Tis good to see you again!"  
"It's good to see you too, Jacque!" Sakura stopped laughing and began blushing furiously as she realized that Li's hand was still in hers. She slowly released it.  
"And this is?"  
"Li. Li Showron." Li said politely, bowing to to the black-suited elderly man, partly to hide his embarrassment.  
"Are you both good friends, yes?" Jacque asked knowingly.  
Sakura's blush deepened. "He's a good friend from Japan, Jacque."  
Jacque nodded and pointed to their luggage. "I'll shall unburden you both, if you wish."  
The two nodded and willingly handed the suitcases over. Kero groaned softly as they got into the long black limo.  
"Your Grandmother must be well-off." Li whispered in awe.  
Jacque chuckled from the front seat. "Madame` Marie is everyone's Grannie, young Sir. She is pleased when others refer to 'er as Grannie Marie."  
  
An hour later, the limo pulled into the winding driveway of a very fancy house in the middle of the country. A long vineyard was to the right of the mansion, and long field of wheat on the left, and a massive garden, maze and pond in the back.  
Sakura grinned as she and Li followed Jacque up the stairs to the trellis-like doors. A young maid opened the doors and bowed them in.  
"Hello, Ranea!" Sakura said happily to the maid. She smiled and shut the doors after them.  
"And who is the 'andsome Missueir?" Ranea whispered jealously to Sakura.  
"A friend from Japan, Ranea. Please don't tease him." Sakura said softly. Ranea grinned and tapped the bridge of her nose.  
"A course, Chere`."  
"Sakura! Dear! You've made it!"  
Sakura and Ranea looked up as a aristocratic woman began gliding down the winding marble staircase, a long feather fan held in a long-fingered hand. Her black sequin and satin dress whispered on the stone. She had gray hair that was piled on top of her head in a mass of curls. Diamonds glittered around her throat, wrists, fingers, and in her hair.  
"Grannie Marie!" Sakura said happily as she embraced the woman. "You look well!"  
Grannie Marie waved the compliment aside. "That's what they all say. My old bones only get older, and it gets 'arder to get up each morning. But enough of that. Dear, you look wonderful! Such a lovely young lady! Did you not bring a friend with you?"  
Sakura nodded and pulled away from Grannie Marie. She grabbed Li's hand and pulled him forward. "This is Li. Li, this is my Grannie Marie."  
Li blushed and bowed, mumbling his thanks for being invited. Grannie Marie grinned wider.  
"I see. 'Ave you been friends long?"  
"Almost four years now, Grannie Marie." Sakura said, blushing in an identical way to Li.  
Grannie Mari nodded. "Good. 'Tis always good to 'ave good friends. Well, Ranea, Jacque, why not show them to their rooms. We'll talk after you've settled in. I've so much planned for us to do!"  
Li and Sakura waved to Grannie Marie as they followed Jacque and Marie up the staircase.  
  
  
Getting good soon!  
Sakura: I love this movie!  
(Li nods and passes the popcorn bowl to Sakura.)  
Max: The Mummy's our fav movie! Brendan Fraser is beyond hot!  
(Raye, Heaven, Psycho, Max, and Sakura sigh dreamily. Ameoba Boy and Li begin to glare angrily at Brendan Fraser on the tv.)  
Blair Witch (nodding in agreement): I could just eat him up!  
(Everyone shoots nervous glances at the witch.)  
Raye: Oooh! Oooh! The next part is just great! 


	5. Sakura In Paris ch.5

Sakura in Paris  
Part Five: The First Night  
  
Raye: Pass the popcorn.  
Ameoba Boy: Hey! Let me have some!  
(A squabble over the popcorn ensues, Raye winning.)  
Li: Weakling.  
(Ameoba Boy sighs and looks down sadly.)  
Blair Witch: Oh, don't look so sad, honey. Here, hold this for me while I get my camera out of my purse.  
(The Blair Witch hands Ameoba Boy a set of rusty, blood-encrusted knives.)  
Raye: You can have some popcorn now, Ameoba Boy. Ameoba Boy? Ameoba Boy?  
(Raye looks over to see a fainted Ameoba Boy and a humming Blair Witch rummaging through her purse. She sighs and shakes her head.)  
Raye: On with the next fic part. (~ _~)  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Don't bother me! I'm thinking up the next part!  
I told you once before, Joe, I did not make Cardcaptors!  
You idiot! I told you that once before, too! Clamp did!  
Arggh! Someone get me a new secretary!!!  
  
  
Ranea dropped Sakura's bags beside the canopy bed. "The same room as always, Chere`."  
"Where's Li's room?" Sakura asked absently as she threw the Kero-filled bookbag onto the bed.  
Ranea grinned. "Misseuir Li's room is across the hall. You know, originally, you and your friend were to stay in the same room. Do you still wish for those arangements?"  
Sakura blushed. "Well....no....I....really...." She looked up at the grinning Ranea. "Oh, you meanie!" She picked up a pillow and threw it at the laughing maid.  
"We grew up together, Chere`! I know you better than most! You care much about this boy, no?"  
Sakura blushed again. "Don't say anything Ranea."  
Ranea nodded understandingly. "You must tell 'im sometime, Chere`. Better sooner than later."  
Sakura nodded. "I will before the summer's over. I know I will."  
Ranea grinned wryly. "I 'ope you do, Chere`. I 'ope you do."  
  
"Do you like the quarters, Sir?" Jacque said politely as Li gazed wonderingly around the room.  
"Oh, it's perfect, Jacque! Thank you!"  
Jacque grinned. "Is good. See you in a while, Sir." The butler turned to leave.   
"Call me Li, not Sir, please."  
Jacque stopped and smiled. "Yes, Li."  
  
That night, after a very fancy, french dinner:  
"So, you two are allowed free rein of the 'ouse and grounds, and you are free to do whatever you wish, just as long as you stay out of trouble. For tonight, you can do whatever you please, but tomorrow, oh, 'ow much planned I've planned! After breakfast, we'll go out on the town, and then after dinner, we'll 'ave a small party and I can show you both off to my friends and neighbors! Oh, what fun!"  
Li and Sakura grinned back at the happy woman. Sakura nudged Li in the side.  
"So what do you want to do?"  
Li shrugged. "I don't know. Do you have anything planned?"  
Sakura grinned. "Well, it's been five years since the last time I was here, and I'm sure the Garden's changed....."  
"We can go for a walk if you want."  
Sakura's grin widened. "Thanks Li! That's just what I wanted to do!"  
"Be sure to be back inside in an 'our or two, dears." Grannie Marie called after the two as they rushed out the doors. She sighed wistfully.  
"'Ow 'ealth is wasted on the youth."   
Jacque grinned and nodded in agreement as Ranea and two other maids, Bellabou` and Pirovoti, began to clear the spacious grand table.  
  
Kero groaned as he pulled himself from Sakura's bookbag. The Guardian of the Clow did not look at all happy or healthy. His normal yellowish-gold skin had a sickly green tinge to it. He groaned again as he plopped onto the bed face-first, his face spreading flat onto the bedspread, the pefect picture of misery.  
"No more .....Twinkies.....and .....plane rides..... for..... me....."  
  
Sakura sighed happily. The Garden hadn't changed at all since the last time she was here, shortly after her ninth birthday. It was exactly how she remembered it.  
"There's the swing!"  
Sakura ran to the wicker-and-pine swing and sat, swinging back and forth and humming contentedly. Li watched her for a moment, gulped nervously, and came to sit by her.  
"This is nice." Sakura said drowzily, not even bothering to open her eyes. Li nodded and leaned back. The stars were out and twinkled down merrily at the two.  
Sakura sighed. "Poor Grannie Marie. Life's been so much harder for her since Granpa died...."  
Li lowered his head apologetically. "I'm sorry..."  
Sakura opened her eyes. "Don't be. I don't really remember him that well. He was always in London, or New York, or some other foreign place on business."  
"How....how did he die? If it's not too much to ask." Li said softly.  
"In a boating accident. His cruise ship and a tanker collided with each other not too far from here."  
Li and Sakura both sighed sadly. Sakura leaned over, stopping the swing with her feet, and stared down at the dirt ground. Li leaned over as well.  
They looked up and froze. They were so close. Their noses were almost touching.  
Li gulped. Sakura looked so beautiful right then. Her emerald green eyes were glowing in the starlight, and her hair had a silvery sheen to it. He wished she knew about his feelings...  
Sakura held her breath. Li was so cute and forbidding-looking right then. And he was so nice to her....  
Sakura leaned closer to Li, holding her breath, their lips almost touching .......  
  
  
  
Heaven: OH MY GOD!! YOU ARE BEYOND CRUEL!!!!  
Raye: It's a gift.  
Max: SHUT THE HELL UP! THE FAT-DUDE'S ABOUT TO DIE!!  
Everyone: SPOIL THE MOVIE, WHY DON'T YA!!  
Blair Witch (In a very calm, quiet voice): Everyone will shut up, or I'll dissembowel all of you.  
(Complete and utter silence.)  
Blair Witch (Humming contentedly): That's better......  
(Fat-dude dies, Sakura screams and clutches Li's hand.)  
Li (Gasping in pain): You're ....squeezing.....too.....tight!  
(Sakura blushes and let's go of his hand, but manages to edge closer to him on the couch. Li shakes his hand and blows on it, then blushes when he realizes how close Sakura is.....)  
Max: Everyone is beyond sad....  
Everyone: SHUT UP NOW!!!  
(Utter silence again...)  
  



	6. Sakura In Paris ch.6

Sakura in Paris  
Part Six: The First Day  
  
So, what do ya think'll happen? Do Sakura and Li kiss?  
Or not....?  
Heaven (In a dangerously quiet voice): They had better or....  
(Makes strangling motions)  
Raye (Laughing weakly): Hah, ha, ha, uh, Max, HELP!  
Max: Break it up you two. NOW!  
Ameoba Boy: What are you doing, Raye?  
Raye: Writing my will .....  
Heaven: I WILL KILL YOU! I WILL KILL YOU!  
Psycho (Whistles loudly): All of you shut the Hell up, or I'll let my cousin twice removed on you!  
(Muttering silence)  
Raye: You kill me Heaven, and I'll leave all of my anime stuff to Max.  
Heaven: But...But... She'll destroy it all!  
Raye: Then at least I would have gotten you back for killing me.  
(Heaven sighs in defeat and sits down)  
Raye: Next fic part, coming right up!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I don't own Cardcaptors.....  
I didn't make it......  
Don't bother me anymore about it.....  
Or I will rip your head off.....  
Thank you.... *(^-^)*  
  
  
"SAKURA! GET AWAY FROM IT!"  
Sakura and Li jumped back in surprise, Sakura sprawling out on in the dirt, and Li bumping his head painfully on the swing bar.  
Kero growled fiercely, or at least as fiercely as a flying fluffy mouse can, and floated over. "Keep your hands off her, Brat! You leave her alone!  
"You little..." Li tried to snatch Kero out of the air, but the creature darted away, sticking his tongue out at Li.  
Sakura tapped Kero on the shoulder. "Ahem."  
Kero spun around. "Are you okay, Sakura? He didn't touch you did he?"  
Sakura frowned ever so slightly and sighed. "No, he didn't Kero..."  
"Good!"  
"But you're not supposed to be out of the room. Grannie and the others don't know about you. It's not good if they see you."  
Li was fuming. The closest he had ever gotten to Sakura, the closest he had ever been to telling her, and the Thing had to ruin it for him! And Sakura didn't seem upset that Kero had interrupted them...  
Oh no! What if she's glad he showed up? Li thought suddenly.  
Sakura tapped Kero severely on the head. "Back to the room, and be careful. We'll talk later."  
Kero left, sticking his tongue out at Li again in warning and Li glaring daggers at the Guardian. Sakura dusted herself off.  
And we were so close to kis-  
  
The next day was a hectic one. Grannie Marie acted quite unlike her age, somehow finding more energy than either one of the two 14 year olds she dragged along after her. Jacque and Ranea, both of whom were allowed to come along, were somehow better off, because they were used to their employers fits of shopping and such in Paris.  
They visited the Eiffel Tower, the Lavoure`, and several other famous tourist-spots, and went to three different malls. Kero, who had been allowed to come along as long as he stayed silent and safe in Sakura's bookbag, was in Heaven every time they stopped to rest or eat, when Sakura slipped him bits of food.  
By the end of the day, Sakura, Li, and Kero were all very fine with the idea of returning home. Sakura sighed as they slipped into Grannie Marie's limo. "My feet are killing me."  
"I couldn't eat another bite of all that delicious food!" Kero whispered and sighed happily as he patted his very ample stomach.  
Li nodded wearily, too tired to say anything.   
On the long ride home, as twilight fell, Sakura dozed off. As the limo turned the last bend in the winding driveway, Sakura fell across the seat, her head coming to rest on Li's shoulder. Li smiled down at her.  
She's so angelic in her sleep. Almost more angelic than she is when she's awake.  
The car came to a stop and Jacque opened the door for them, smiling at the sweet couple. "Do you need any 'elp, Li?"  
Li blushed and gently woke Sakura. "I'm fine."  
"What? But school's out, Dad......" Sakura said in surprise, trailing off as she realized where she was. She blushed and brushed a stray hair from her eyes. "Sorry about that."  
"That's quite all right, Sakura." Jacque said as Ranea, giggling, helped her out of the car and onto her feet. Li climbed out after her, trying to shut the door and leave Kero locked in for the night as discreetly as possible. No such luck.  
"Oh! I forgot my bookbag!" Sakura said just before the door shut. Li sighed in despair as Sakura rescued the offending object and a sleeping Kero.  
Jacque and Ranea followed Li and Sakura up the stairs to the awaiting Grannie Marie.  
"We must 'urry! Dinner's ready, and as soon as 'tis over, the party's yet to come!"  
Sakura and Li tried desperately to paste happy grins of anticipation of their near-numb faces. They felt like they were about to collapse.  
"You'll both get used to it!" Ranea whispered laughingly.  
"We hope!"  
  
  
'Tis it goo'? Please, Missueirs and Madamoiselles, tell me the truth!  
Max: Put a sock in it!  
Heaven (Staring like a zombie with her face pressed up against the tv screen): I'm too into the movie to care about much else right now.....  
(DinG-DonG!!!)  
Max: Get the door Heaven...  
Heaven: Get the door Li....  
Li: Get the door Sakura....  
Sakura: Get the door Psycho...  
Psycho: Get the door Cousin Blair....  
Blair Witch: Get the door Raye...  
Raye: Get the door Ameoba Boy...  
(Ameoba Boy looks around for someone to order, but there is no one.)  
Ameoba Boy: You get it, Raye!  
(Raye gives Andrew the Ultimate Death Glare {Imagine the type Heero gives the entire world}.)  
(Ameoba Boy scuttles out of the room.)  
Ameoba Boy: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!  
Max (Sigh): Is it another homicidal devilwitch?  
Ameoba Boy: WORSE! IT'S THE Lizzie!!!  
Everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! 


	7. Sakura In Paris ch.7

Sakura in Paris  
Part Seven: The Party  
  
(Author's Note: The Lizzie is someone we hate, I mean really hate, at CGS.)  
To recap:  
Ameoba Boy: WORSE! IT'S THE Lizzie!  
Everyone: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  
the Lizzie: Hy-ee!  
(Everyone is in a panic, running around the room like chickens with their heads cut off, the movie and Brendan Fraser completely forgotten in their race for survival)  
Max (Scrambling up the wall-side, digging into the paint with her nails): HELP!  
Ameoba Boy (Sitting in the corner and praying in Hebrew): Oh, Jehova......  
Blair Witch: It's the Devil's Right Hand, the Hyper One!  
(Raye, Li, Sakura, Psycho, and Heaven have dived under the couch and are holding their breaths, hoping the Plague-like One will over-look them...)  
Sakura: Li, I'm scared!  
Li: I am too! But at least we're not alone...  
Raye: If the window of opportunity opens, I'm jumping through it and out of here!  
Heaven: I'm with ya, Bar!  
(the Lizzie grins manically.)  
the Lizzie: They missed me!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I've a new plan!  
I will build a time machine that will take me back in time...  
Then I will say I created Cardcaptors, and MKR, and X/1999!  
Then I will be the greatest one-woman team!  
Even better than Clamp!  
HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAH!  
(Voice disappears in a raspy gasp from too much laughing)  
(Croaking) I'm gonna get some cough-drops....  
  
  
  
Sakura sighed and looked down at the violet kimono. "Are you sure I look okay?"  
Ranea grinned reassuringly. "You look wonderful, Chere`! And I'm sure a certain young Missueir will notice you..."  
Sakura blushed and threw "the Pillow" at Ranea. "Stop that!"  
"You 'ave not told 'im? But Jacque and I were so sure after las' night..."  
Sakura gasped. "I told you not to tell anyone! Not even Jacque!"  
Ranea raised her hands in appeasement. "I did not tell 'im, Chere`! Jacque came to me and told me 'e knew that Li 'ad feelings for you!"  
Sakura gasped and stared at Ranea. "Jacque said that Li had feelings for me? You're not playing some mean joke on me, are you?"  
Ranea shook her head forcibly. "No, Chere`! Jacque told me this 'imself!"  
Sakura pondered over this. "Then why hasn't Li told me himself?"  
Ranea smiled. "Mayhap young Li is 'aving the same problems you yourself are, Chere`."  
Sakura sighed as another maid, Rosetta, came to the door.   
"Madame` Marie wishes you both to come downstairs to ze party. Ze guests are arriving."  
  
"And this is Tom, Li." Grannie Marie said, introducing Li to the boy his age. Tom bowed politely.  
"I am 'oping we can become goo' friends, Li." Tom said in his deep voice.  
Li nodded. The black-haired boy turned to leave the room, when she appeared.  
Sakura came down the grand staircase, wearing a violet kimono and holding a lavender paper fan, laughing with Ranea and Rosetta.  
"And who is that, Madame` Marie?" Tom asked in a breathless voice. Grannie Marie grinned.  
"That is my Granddaughter, Sakura, Tom. Is she not lovely?"  
Tom nodded numbly, his eyes still fixed on Sakura.   
Li rushed to the stairs to greet Sakura first. Ranea and Rosetta slipped away into the crowd, mumbling about "important jobs".  
"You look wonderful, Sakura." Li said softly as she reached him. Sakura blushed.  
"Thanks Li." She looked him in the eyes and started to ask about what Ranae had revealed, when Tom appeared.  
"Madamoiselle, I think we've not yet met." Tom said, sweeping a long bow. "My name is Tom."  
Sakura blushed again. "Mine's Sakura. It's nice to meet you Tom."  
Ranea suddenly showed up at Sakura's side. "The dancing's starting in the ballroom, Chere`."  
Sakura grinned in thanks, knowing that only she and Li had heard the whispered comment.   
Li took a deep breath. Now or never. "Would you like to dance, Sakura?"  
Sakura smiled. "I'd love to Li."  
Tom watched speechlessly as Sakura and Li swept off through the crowds together.  
  
  
Raye: Don't.....make....a.......noise.....She'll......hear.....you..  
the Lizzie: Hello!  
Raye, Li, Sakura, Psycho and Heaven: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!  
(Ameoba Boy looks up briefly from his praying, and Max stops clawing into the wall. There's now a large hole starting in said wall. The Blair Witch looks up from her ceremony of trying to banish the Evil One {the Lizzie}.)  
Ameoba Boy (Helping a breathless Raye to her feet): We've got to work together for once, or we're not going to survive.  
Raye (Nodding reluctantly): Deal.  
(the Lizzie begins to look nervous as the entire group begins advancing grimly on her, several butcher knives in obvious view.)  
SLAMMMMMM!!  
(Raye and the others stare in amazement at the closed, locked, door.)  
Raye (Incredulously): We scared It!  
(Sighs of relief and whoops of happiness run unabounds......) 


	8. Sakura In Paris ch.8

Sakura in Paris  
Part Eight: Revelations  
  
  
The Lizzie is locked in the spare bedroom at the moment.  
Thank God.  
Choir in the Background: Ha-leluya!  
And the Blair Witch is on guard duty at the moment...  
Blair Witch: Cousin Psycho! I'm getting hungry!  
Psycho: Well, if the Lizzie shows her pointy head, you're free to eat her!  
Ameoba Boy: What's that noise?  
Max: Sounds like a combination of teeth chattering, whimpers, and large pieces of furniture being pushed up against a door....  
the Lizzie: Leave me alone!  
Heaven: Revenge is so sweet. We're just getting back at you for all the years of pain and suffering you've put us through!  
Ameoba Boy: I don't mean to intrude on anyone's happy feelings, but do you hear gunshots?  
(The front door opens and slams shut again, a disheveled girl leaning against the closed door with a rifle clutched in her hands.)  
Ameoba Boy: Is that.... It can't be.... Da Bomb?  
Da Bomb (Panting): I'm on the run! The police think I killed Kyle!  
(Everyone stares at Da Bomb and waits.)  
Raye: Your point being....  
Da Bomb: I didn't!  
Max: Are you sure?  
Da Bomb: I did not kill my boyfriend! I swear it! I'm being framed! That evil Kassie did it!  
Raye: While we keep the SWAT Team from battering down the door, comfort a disraught Da Bomb, and keep the Hyper One locked away safely, here's the next fic part.....  
SWAT Team: OPEN THE DOOR NOW!  
BAMMM! BAMMM! BAMMM! BAMMM.....  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
From the Head of Heather(Max):  
I am King! Give me all your meats and cheeses!  
All hail King Palaski!  
Remember the cotton gin!  
Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? SpongeBob Squarepants!!  
Triangle Man beat Particle Man with a frying pan!  
Oh, and Bar didn't make Cardcaptors. Clamp did.  
Ahem. I'm gonna go take my pills now.  
  
  
  
Sakura felt like she was walking on air. Dancing like this in Li's arms was wonderful. She was sure she was dreaming.  
Li felt the exact same. She's an angel. Pure and simple.  
The darkened ballroom and soft music were taking hold of Sakura. The girl was nearly asleep in moments, her arms around Li's neck, her head on his shoulder, when...  
"Pardon me, but may I cut in?"  
Li glared at Tom and reluctantly let go of Sakura. "For now."  
Sakura and Tom began to dance, Tom very pleased and Sakura and Li thoroughly depressed. Li went to stand by a long table to wait for the end of the dance, when he could rescue Sakura.  
Ranea swept by, dancing with another servant, her boyfriend named Jean. "Why are you not dancing with Chere`?"  
Li sighed and nodded over at Sakura and Tom. "Tom cut in."  
Ranea frowned. "We shall 'ave to take care of 'im."  
And she swept off again. Li was somewhat mystified by Ranea's comment, but realized what she meant a moment later when Grannie Marie interrupted Tom and Sakura.  
"I would love to talk to you about your father, Tom. Could you spare the time?"  
Tom reluctantly went with Marie into another room, not wanting to offend the elderly woman. Sakura immediately found Li and the two began dancing again.  
Sakura gulped and tried to find the courage to speak. "Li, there was something I wanted to ask you."  
Li nodded. "What?"  
Sakura took a deep breath and glued her eyes to the floor. "It's about something Ranea told me. Something she heard from Jacque..."  
"What?" Li asked breathlessly.  
"She said..." Sakura faltered for a moment. "That Jacque thinks you've got ..... feelings .... for me."  
Li was silent. He couldn't find the strength to speak.  
Sakura looked up. "Is it true?"  
Li gulped. She looks like she's about to cry. He bowed his head and nodded ever so slowly. I'll never be able to tell her unless I do now. I don't think I'll ever find the courage to again... "Yeah, it's true."  
Sakura stood there with bated breath. "Really? Truly?"  
Li nodded. "I could never tell you before. I was afraid you'd never speak to me again if I did."  
"Thank God, Li! I was so afraid you didn't care about me!" Sakura cried, hugging him tightly, crying in happiness. Li blushed in surprise.  
"The thing is Li, I..... I ....." She stopped then gulped. "I care about you too!"  
Li stared in surprise until he found his voice again. "Why didn't you tell me before?"  
"I never could! I wanted too, oh how I wanted to! But I never could!"  
  
Jacque smiled at the couple, then turned to Ranea. "What do you think, Ranea? Will they last?"  
Ranea grinned. "They will if I've anything to say about it!"  
  
  
Raye: But officers! We don't know who you're talking about! There's no Alyssa Bomhold here!  
(Max is suddenly struck with inspiration.)  
Max: Officers, will you let us off the hook if we hand Alyssa over to you?  
Officer: Yes, seeing as how you did not help with the murder.  
Max: She's in that room, Officer. She locked herself in.  
Officer: Bring the battering ram in, Boys!  
BAMMM! BAMMM! BAMMM!  
the Lizzie: Ack! What're you doing? Get your hands off of me!  
Officer: You're wanted for first-degree murder charges. You have the right to remain silent...  
the Lizzie: I didn't kill anyone! Please, believe me! Guys, tell them it wasn't me! GUYS!!!  
Heaven: Max, I now crown you Queen of the World.  
Da Bomb (the Alyssa they're looking for): Be careful, Officers! She's a cronic liar! Don't believe a word she tells you! She's insane!  
the Lizzie (the other Alyssa): NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!  
(The paddywagon drives off in a cloud of smoke as Max is raised onto everyone's shoulders....)7 


	9. Sakura In Paris ch.9

Sakura in Paris  
Part Nine: Discovery  
  
Raye: Party! Party! Party!  
Max: Everyone celebrate and sing along with me!  
Everyone (In harmony): Ding-dong, the witch is gone! Which old witch? The wicked Witch! Ding-dong, the Wicked Witch is gone!  
Da Bomb: I know we're all glad that I'm still free and the Lizzie's behind bars, but we need to work to clear my name and ruin Kassie's! I know she was the one that killed Kyle!  
Psycho: Oh my God! They killed Kyle!  
(Blair Witch and Da Bomb comfort a sobbing Psycho.)  
Da Bomb: It's okay Chris! You'll find another to obsess over....  
Psycho: But....But....but Kyle was ......Kyle!  
Raye: If we're gonna prove Da Bomb's innocence and convict Kassie, we're gonna need some more help....  
Max & Heaven & Raye: And we know just who to call!  
Ameoba Boy: You'll have to excuse us while the cackling hags call more help. Meanwhile, enjoy the next par-(Starts gagging)  
Raye (Smiling sweetly as she chokes Ameoba Boy): Oh, Ms.Blair! Are you still hungry?  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
  
And now, a message from Poet Psycho...  
(Enters the stage, dressed in french outfit)  
Ahem. Roses are red, violets are blue,  
I miss you so much Kyle, I do!  
Raye don't own Cardcaptors, Clamp do!  
Oh, boo hoo hoo hoo hooooooooooo!  
Thank you.  
(Bows and leaves the stage amid slight applause.)  
  
  
"I'm sorry Missueir Tom, but Madamoiselle Sakura has retired already. She is not to be disturbed." Jacque told the wistful Tom. "I'm sure you can call on 'er later."  
At that moment, Sakura and Li were sitting on the swing in the Garden, sleep being the last thing on their minds.  
"How long have you had feelings for me, Li?"  
"I'm not sure. Sometime before the day you caught the Freeze Card."  
Sakura giggled.  
"What's so funny?"  
"It's the same with me!"  
  
Back at the house....  
Kero was asleep, floating a few feet above Sakura's bed and snoring softly. He was so deep in sleep, he didn't even notice the sound of approaching footsteps, or the sound of the door-knob turning, or the creak as it opened.  
"Almighty Lord! What is that thing?" Ranea exclaimed as she stepped into the room.  
Kero snored gently and turned on his side. "Yum....cake...."  
Ranea armed herself with a poker from the fire-place and approached Kero slowly.  
Kero rolled over again as Ranea prodded him with the poker. "Ummm...the new Xylon Warriors game.....pancakes......"  
Ranea poked him again. He turned to his other side, mumbling about bathtubs of maple syrup.  
The girl was thoroughly angry now. She grabbed the flying (actually, floating) mouse and shook him.  
"Wake up!"  
"Ahhhhh! Save the pop tarts!" Kero screamed. He stopped in mid-scream and his eyes grew wide as he realized who had awaken him.  
"Uh oh. Um, uh, you're, uh, you're....dreaming! That's it! You're dreaming! This is all just a dream! You're really not seeing me! I'm not real!"  
Ranea pinched Kero on the cheek.  
"OUCH! Why'd ya do that?"  
"To make sure I wasn't dreaming."  
"You're supposed to pinch yourself, not someone else!" Kero yelled angrily.  
"What is going on in 'ere?" Jacque asked as he entered the room.  
"You're dreaming! Both of you are dreaming!"  
"I think not Missueir! Or Madamoiselle. I'm not quite sure what you are."  
"I'm Kero! Guardian of the Clow! Sakura's partner! I am not a Missueir or Madamoiselle, whatever those are! And, I AM NOT A STUFFED ANIMAL!!!!!!!"  
Ranea and Jacque blinked in surprise, their hair blown back.  
"Excuse me." Jacque said quietly as he fell backwards, unconscious.  
  
  
Do ya like it? Do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya......  
Everyone: SHUT UP!  
Ameoba Boy: Guys! Check out the news! (Turns up the volume)  
Announcer: And we've just recieved this bulletin....It seems that in the prison section of Zellers Institute for the Mentally Insane, a prisoner has escaped. Authorities say her name is Alyssa Bomhold, age 14, 5 ft. 4, who currently attends Washington High School, who is convicted for first-degree murder. Her victim was one Kyle Cotham, age 15, who also attended Washington High School. Authorities say she is mentally insane and highly unpridictable, as well as a chronic liar. She escaped after managing to unlock her cell, killing two guards and rendering another unconscious. She also thoroughly angered the warden, blew up over half of the Institute, and released over 237 prisoners. If this girl is seen, please contact the Institute at 876-5432, and give any imformation you can. And in the Stock Markets- (Tv turns off.)  
Max: Uh oh....  
Raye: We're...  
Heaven: Thoroughly..  
Ameoba Boy: And royally...  
Everyone: SCREWED! 


	10. Sakura In Paris ch.11

Sakura in Paris  
Part Eleven: The Picnic Day  
  
Jo: So then we lure Kassie to the old abandoned barn, and we use a decoy, ( Everyone looks at Ameoba Boy) and lure her into the trap. We spring the trap, make it seem like we're gonna kill her, get a written confession and enough evidence to convict her, and Da Bomb's as good as saved!  
(Everyone cheers, Da Bomb breathes a sigh of relief.)  
the Lizzie (Extremely pissed): Let me in! I know you're in there! Let me in!!!  
(Silence.)  
the Lizzie (Screaming shrilly): I'M GONNA BREAK IN AND RIP YOUR HEADS OFF!!!  
(Ameoba Boy whimpers and Sakura edges closer to Li.)  
Max (Whispering): Here's the thing. We can't put Operation Kassie into effect if the Lizzie is chasing us. So here's the plan. Amangela and the Blair Witch and Psycho stay here and keep the Lizzie busy. Li and Sakura, I think you should just lay low here where it's somewhat safe. Ameoba Boy and everyone else comes with me and Jo. Go, go, go!  
(Group splits up.)  
Amangela: So, what do we do to keep the Lizzie busy?  
Psycho (Grinning evilly): We trap her, tie her to a chair, and use Cousin Blair's powers to force her to watch a 72 hour long marathon of Barney and Teletubbies!  
(Blair Witch, Psycho, and Amangela high-five.)  
the Lizzie (Banging on the door with a sledgehammer): LET ME IN! LET ME IN! LET ME IN!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I'm using self-help books to overcome my depression of not owning Cardcaptors.   
So here goes. (Taking a deep calming breath)  
Clamp owns Cardcaptors.  
I do not.  
Clamp owns Cardcaptors.  
I do not.  
Clamp owns Cardcaptors.  
I do not.  
Clamp....owns....Cardcaptors.....  
(Shredding Math Textbook into little chibi pieces.)  
I DO NOT!!  
(Screams and begins tearing up the room. Nurses rush in with a straight-jacket and plenty of tranquilizers......)  
  
  
Sakura laughed and rushed ahead of the others, urging Lady into a gallop. Li struggled to catch up with her on his gray horse Squints, who was, needless-to-say, getting on in his old age.  
"Don't go so fast!" Li called worriedly, afraid she'd fall off of Lady.  
"Try and stop me, Li!"  
Kero grinned from the bookbag slung over the saddle-horn. "Hah hah! Little Brat afraid to really ride a horse?!?"  
A trail of dust blasted Kero face-first as Li passed them, glaring at Kero the entire time.  
Sakura blinked and burst into giggles as Lady pulled up alongside Squints. "Aren't we having fun now?"  
"Sure!"  
  
"Let's put the picnic cloth under that willow." Grannie Marie decided. Jacque nodded and he and Jean, the servant boyfriend of Ranea, went to set the picnic up.  
Ranea, Rosetta, and Sakura giggled as they splashed each other in the tiny creek.  
"Come on in, Li! It's fun!"  
Li shook his head and squared his shoulders. "I'm just staying here to make sure none of you get hurt."  
Three streams of water splashed Li. "Bulls-eye!"  
Li glared grimly at the giggling girls, water dripping down his face. "That's it. No more Mister Nice-Guy."  
Jacque, Jean, and Grannie Marie looked up as three screams of laughter shattered the silence.  
  
Later that day, after the girls and Li had dried out in the sun, the group sat under the willow tree, relaxing.   
Sakura sat up and looked around. Nearly everyone was asleep, and Ranea and Jean were sitting down by the creek, finger's intertwined. She looked over at Li, who was idly pulling up grasses.  
"Let's go explore, Li. I've got to do something."  
Li nodded and helped her up.  
The two went walking through the giant wheat field behind the willow tree and creek.  
"Where's Kero? I'm surprised he isn't following us, nagging you and telling me to keep my claws to myself." Li said.  
Sakura looked over to the willow tree. She could just barely see the sleeping Kero, who's tail and right legs were dangling over the willow branch he had decided on using as a bed.  
"Not even Kero can stay awake after eating an entire watermelon and sitting out in the sun."  
"Well, at least we'll get a moment's of peace alone together." Li said with a smile.  
Sakura grinned as they disappeared into the wheat field.  
  
  
Kassie: Who are all of you? Why did you ask me to come out to this disgusting barn?  
Ghostly Voice: We know you killed Kyle, Kassie! We know you framed an innocent girl! We know you deserve punishment!  
Kassie (Frightened Voice): Le...lea...leave me alone! Just leave me alone!  
(Turns to run out of the barn and skids to a stop. A ghostly figure is standing in the doorway, hovering above the dirt floor, very tall and wearing a billowing robe of white.)  
Kassie: AIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!  
(Turns and runs straight into the trap. The giant mesh net entangles her as she screams, hanging several feet above the floor, and upside down, too.)  
Ghostly Voice: Admit it! Admit that you killed Kyle! Admit that Da Bomb didn't do it! Admit it!  
Kassie (In a shrill, terrified voice.): Okay! Okay! I did it! I killed him with my dad's rifle and buried him in the Nevada Salt Flats! Okay! I admit it! I planted the rifle at Da Bomb's house and staged a scuffle there! I'm the one that told the police I saw her do it! Okay! Please, let me go! Let me live! PLEASE!!!  
Ghostly Voice: Did you get all that, Fluffy?  
Max: Sure did. You were great Ange!  
Ghostly Voice: I know. It's a talent, I guess.  
Ameoba Boy: Can you guys get me down! It's really cold! And this steel wire's cutting into my skin!  
Da Bomb: Whimp.  
Ameoba Boy (Sniff): Just get me down!  
Kassie: What'n the Hell's going on here?!?!?!  
Da Bomb: We just saved my skin and threw you in the boiling pot, Kassie!  
(Kassie is stunned into silence as the group come out from behind hay bales. Raye is carrying a giant megaphone, and Da Bomb and Max have video cameras and tape recorders. A crane creaks as Jo lowers Ameoba Boy to the ground. Heaven's trying to keep herself from keeling over with laughter.)  
Max (Holding up the video camera to her eye): Smile! You're on Candid Camera! 


	11. Sakura In Paris ch.12

Sakura in Paris  
Part Twelve: Lost!!  
  
  
the Lizzie: NO MORE! NO MORE! NO MORE!  
(the Lizzie is tied to a stiff, uncomfortable wooden chair with twine, her eyes propped open with toothpicks, sitting before a giant tv screen.)  
the Lizzie: AHHHH! NO MORE TELETUBBIES! NO MORE BARNEY! PLEASE! NO MORE!!!!  
Psycho (Grinning evilly): What do ya think, Amangela? Cousin Blair? Has she had enough?  
(The two take three nano-seconds to think)  
Both: NAHHH!  
the Lizzie: PLEASE! PLEASE! PPPPLLLLEEEEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSEEEEEEE!  
Psycho: Swear you'll leave us alone for the rest of eternity. Swear you'll never bug us again. Swear that you'll never talk to us again. Swear that you'll give up anime and manga!  
the Lizzie: OKAY! I GIVE! I SWEAR TO LEAVE EVERYONE ALONE! I SWEAR ALL THOSE THINGS!  
Psycho: Our work is done here.   
(She and Amangela and Blair Witch high-five.)  
Amangela: Well, I gotta go. I promised Mom I'd be home by nine to baby-sit my sisters.  
(Blair Witch and Psycho wave to Amangela as she leaves.)  
Jo (Triumphantly): We did it! Da Bomb's name's been cleared!  
(Everyone cheers and slaps Da Bomb on the back as numerous police cars pull up. Kassie starts crying.)  
Officer: We're here for the murderer.  
Raye: Here ya go, Officer! Bye-bye Kassie! Have fun in the State Prison!  
Max: We just know you'll love your new prison wardrobe!  
Officer: Is that the Alyssa you handed over to us before I see in there tied to a chair?  
Psycho: Sure is.  
(Officer walks up to the Lizzie and unties her.)  
Officer: We wish to apologize for the mistake. You are no longer accused of first-degree murder......  
the Lizzie: Yayyyyyy!!!!  
Officer: But you are wanted for 17 acts of larceny, two murders, and three acts of illegal use of weapons....  
(the Lizzie is dragged off to a police car.)  
the Lizzie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Heaven: Bon Voyage, Lizzie!  
Max: Forget to write!  
Ameoba Boy: Ta ta!  
Raye: See ya in fifty years!  
Sakura & Li: Good luck with parole!  
the Lizzie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Let's all sing the Lizzie off.  
I hate you,  
we all hate you,  
have a good time in the cling,  
we never want to see you again!  
With a good swift kick,  
and a bomb just for you!  
I don't own Cardcaptors, but Clamp do!  
  
Sakura looked up at the darkened sky. "I think we should head back now, Li."  
Li sighed and nodded reluctantly, helping her to her feet. Sakura looks around.  
"Which way is the willow?"  
Li looked around and began to worry. "I'm not sure. I can't see anything. It's too dark."  
"Are we lost, Li?" Sakura asked in a fearful voice.  
Li shook his head firmly. "We're not lost.....We just don't know where we are."  
Sakura began to shiver. "I'm worried Li."  
"Don't be. The other's will find out we're gone and come looking for us. Everything will turn out just fine." But doubt was begining to seep into him faster than the cold.   
I've got to keep a firm front. I can't let Sakura see I'm worried. It'll just make her feel worse. And besides, the others'll find us in no time.  
Li looked up at the appraoching storm clouds. I hope.  
  
"Where could they be, Jacque?" Ranea asked fearfully as a strong wind picked up.  
Kero woke as a long, whippy willow branch slapped him in the face, knocking him out of the tree and onto Ranea's head. Jacque clamped a hand over her mouth to muffle her scream and then grabbed Kero.  
"What are you doing 'ere?" Jacque demanded angrily, shaking Kero for emphahsis. Kero went spirally-eyed, then shook his head to clear it.  
"Sakura invited me along! Hey, where is Sakura?"  
Jacque and Ranea shrugged. "That's what we'd like to know. She and Li are both missing."  
Kero's blood began to boil. "She's off somewhere .... somewhere alone ..... with .... with ... with that .... that ..... THING?!?!?!" Kero promptly flew off towards Grannie Marie's mansion.  
"Where are you going, Kero?!?!?" Ranea yelled after him, just barely making her voice audible over the wind.  
"To get something to help us find them!!"  
  
Sakura shivered. "It's getting too cold for me."  
Li nodded and frowned. If only I had the Lasin Board with me.  
Li suddenly thought of something. "Sakura! Do you have the Clow Cards on you?"  
Sakura stared at Li for a moment, then slapped her forehead with a hand. "Of course! Aren't I such an idiot!"  
"Fly Card!" Sakura called out. Her wand transformed, and she pulled Li on behind her. "We're outta here!"  
The two began rising above the wheat field, but Sakura was finding it harder and harder to fly straight, or to stay on the wand.  
"Li! I can't stay on much longer! Maybe we should get down again and I'll use another card!"  
Li nodded and they began to lower, when the large branch came whistling out of nowhere.  
With a loud crack, the branch struck Sakura's back, pulling her from the wand and hurtling towards the ground. Li remembered losing control of the Fly Card, and falling from the wand himself before hitting the ground and descending into deep darkness......  
  
"We can use this to find Sakura and the Brat!" Kero said proudly as he returned to Jacque and Ranea, who were starting to get worried, dragging the Lasin Board through the air.  
"What is it?" Ranea asked as Jacque looked around to make sure that Rosetta, Grannie Marie, or Jean weren't looking.  
"It's the Lasin Board." Kero said proudly. "Another great creation of my Master, Clow Reed."  
Suddenly and without warning, a stream of blue-white light shot out of the Board, aiming straight through the wheat fields.   
"Yes! It's working! All we have to do is follow this to Li and Sakura!" Kero exclaimed. He blinked in surprise as Jacque and Ranea took off through the wheat field.   
"C'mon! We've got to find them!"  
  
"Ranea!! Jacque!!! Grannie Marie!!! Kero!! Anyone!!!!" Li shouted worriedly into the darkness. He tried to wake the unconscious Sakura beside him for the fourth time. "Sakura! Wake up! Please! Don't leave me!"  
  
  
Raye: Whew! That was a hectic three days.  
Ameoba Boy: I'll say.  
Da Bomb: You would.  
Jo: Guys, I really should be getting home now. I kinda snuck out, and my mom's gonna realize I'm not there in an hour or so....  
Da Bomb: I should be going too, my mom's getting home from work in an hour or so.  
(Everyone waves them off.)  
Blair Witch: Everyone! Max and Heaven have a horrible announcement to make!!  
(Everyone turns to look at the two. A podium and microphone appear out of nowhere.)  
Max: Ahem. We've just been taking stock of our food supplies...  
Heaven: And the money supply Raye's parents left her...  
Max: And we've come to this conclusion.  
(Silence.)  
Both: WE'RE OUT OF FOOD AND MONEY!!  
Everyone: OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE'RE GONNA STARVE!!!!!!!!!!! 


	12. Sakura In Paris ch.13

Sakura in Paris  
Part Twelve: Lost!!  
  
  
the Lizzie: NO MORE! NO MORE! NO MORE!  
(the Lizzie is tied to a stiff, uncomfortable wooden chair with twine, her eyes propped open with toothpicks, sitting before a giant tv screen.)  
the Lizzie: AHHHH! NO MORE TELETUBBIES! NO MORE BARNEY! PLEASE! NO MORE!!!!  
Psycho (Grinning evilly): What do ya think, Amangela? Cousin Blair? Has she had enough?  
(The two take three nano-seconds to think)  
Both: NAHHH!  
the Lizzie: PLEASE! PLEASE! PPPPLLLLEEEEEEEEEAAAAAASSSSSEEEEEEE!  
Psycho: Swear you'll leave us alone for the rest of eternity. Swear you'll never bug us again. Swear that you'll never talk to us again. Swear that you'll give up anime and manga!  
the Lizzie: OKAY! I GIVE! I SWEAR TO LEAVE EVERYONE ALONE! I SWEAR ALL THOSE THINGS!  
Psycho: Our work is done here.   
(She and Amangela and Blair Witch high-five.)  
Amangela: Well, I gotta go. I promised Mom I'd be home by nine to baby-sit my sisters.  
(Blair Witch and Psycho wave to Amangela as she leaves.)  
Jo (Triumphantly): We did it! Da Bomb's name's been cleared!  
(Everyone cheers and slaps Da Bomb on the back as numerous police cars pull up. Kassie starts crying.)  
Officer: We're here for the murderer.  
Raye: Here ya go, Officer! Bye-bye Kassie! Have fun in the State Prison!  
Max: We just know you'll love your new prison wardrobe!  
Officer: Is that the Alyssa you handed over to us before I see in there tied to a chair?  
Psycho: Sure is.  
(Officer walks up to the Lizzie and unties her.)  
Officer: We wish to apologize for the mistake. You are no longer accused of first-degree murder......  
the Lizzie: Yayyyyyy!!!!  
Officer: But you are wanted for 17 acts of larceny, two murders, and three acts of illegal use of weapons....  
(the Lizzie is dragged off to a police car.)  
the Lizzie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
Heaven: Bon Voyage, Lizzie!  
Max: Forget to write!  
Ameoba Boy: Ta ta!  
Raye: See ya in fifty years!  
Sakura & Li: Good luck with parole!  
the Lizzie: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Let's all sing the Lizzie off.  
I hate you,  
we all hate you,  
have a good time in the cling,  
we never want to see you again!  
With a good swift kick,  
and a bomb just for you!  
I don't own Cardcaptors, but Clamp do!  
  
Sakura looked up at the darkened sky. "I think we should head back now, Li."  
Li sighed and nodded reluctantly, helping her to her feet. Sakura looks around.  
"Which way is the willow?"  
Li looked around and began to worry. "I'm not sure. I can't see anything. It's too dark."  
"Are we lost, Li?" Sakura asked in a fearful voice.  
Li shook his head firmly. "We're not lost.....We just don't know where we are."  
Sakura began to shiver. "I'm worried Li."  
"Don't be. The other's will find out we're gone and come looking for us. Everything will turn out just fine." But doubt was begining to seep into him faster than the cold.   
I've got to keep a firm front. I can't let Sakura see I'm worried. It'll just make her feel worse. And besides, the others'll find us in no time.  
Li looked up at the appraoching storm clouds. I hope.  
  
"Where could they be, Jacque?" Ranea asked fearfully as a strong wind picked up.  
Kero woke as a long, whippy willow branch slapped him in the face, knocking him out of the tree and onto Ranea's head. Jacque clamped a hand over her mouth to muffle her scream and then grabbed Kero.  
"What are you doing 'ere?" Jacque demanded angrily, shaking Kero for emphahsis. Kero went spirally-eyed, then shook his head to clear it.  
"Sakura invited me along! Hey, where is Sakura?"  
Jacque and Ranea shrugged. "That's what we'd like to know. She and Li are both missing."  
Kero's blood began to boil. "She's off somewhere .... somewhere alone ..... with .... with ... with that .... that ..... THING?!?!?!" Kero promptly flew off towards Grannie Marie's mansion.  
"Where are you going, Kero?!?!?" Ranea yelled after him, just barely making her voice audible over the wind.  
"To get something to help us find them!!"  
  
Sakura shivered. "It's getting too cold for me."  
Li nodded and frowned. If only I had the Lasin Board with me.  
Li suddenly thought of something. "Sakura! Do you have the Clow Cards on you?"  
Sakura stared at Li for a moment, then slapped her forehead with a hand. "Of course! Aren't I such an idiot!"  
"Fly Card!" Sakura called out. Her wand transformed, and she pulled Li on behind her. "We're outta here!"  
The two began rising above the wheat field, but Sakura was finding it harder and harder to fly straight, or to stay on the wand.  
"Li! I can't stay on much longer! Maybe we should get down again and I'll use another card!"  
Li nodded and they began to lower, when the large branch came whistling out of nowhere.  
With a loud crack, the branch struck Sakura's back, pulling her from the wand and hurtling towards the ground. Li remembered losing control of the Fly Card, and falling from the wand himself before hitting the ground and descending into deep darkness......  
  
"We can use this to find Sakura and the Brat!" Kero said proudly as he returned to Jacque and Ranea, who were starting to get worried, dragging the Lasin Board through the air.  
"What is it?" Ranea asked as Jacque looked around to make sure that Rosetta, Grannie Marie, or Jean weren't looking.  
"It's the Lasin Board." Kero said proudly. "Another great creation of my Master, Clow Reed."  
Suddenly and without warning, a stream of blue-white light shot out of the Board, aiming straight through the wheat fields.   
"Yes! It's working! All we have to do is follow this to Li and Sakura!" Kero exclaimed. He blinked in surprise as Jacque and Ranea took off through the wheat field.   
"C'mon! We've got to find them!"  
  
"Ranea!! Jacque!!! Grannie Marie!!! Kero!! Anyone!!!!" Li shouted worriedly into the darkness. He tried to wake the unconscious Sakura beside him for the fourth time. "Sakura! Wake up! Please! Don't leave me!"  
  
  
Raye: Whew! That was a hectic three days.  
Ameoba Boy: I'll say.  
Da Bomb: You would.  
Jo: Guys, I really should be getting home now. I kinda snuck out, and my mom's gonna realize I'm not there in an hour or so....  
Da Bomb: I should be going too, my mom's getting home from work in an hour or so.  
(Everyone waves them off.)  
Blair Witch: Everyone! Max and Heaven have a horrible announcement to make!!  
(Everyone turns to look at the two. A podium and microphone appear out of nowhere.)  
Max: Ahem. We've just been taking stock of our food supplies...  
Heaven: And the money supply Raye's parents left her...  
Max: And we've come to this conclusion.  
(Silence.)  
Both: WE'RE OUT OF FOOD AND MONEY!!  
Everyone: OH NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WE'RE GONNA STARVE!!!!!!!!!!! 


	13. Sakura In Paris ch.14

Sakura in Paris  
Part Fourteen: Tom Guvera  
  
  
(Ameoba Boy, dressed in a pitch helmet and safari outfit, armed with an elephant gun, is prowling about Raye's basement, with the rest of the Gang, which is also called "The Pit of Lost Souls".)  
Ameoba Boy: Do you see anything resembling food?  
Sakura: I thought I saw a potato, but it ran away from me when I got closer....  
(Everyone sweatdrops as Raye giggles nervously.)  
Raye: Oh, uh, ah, uh, my, uh, my science project from fifth grade....  
Psycho: Did you hear that?  
(Sakura grabs Li's arm and Ameoba Boy whimpers like a school-girl.)  
Raye: I'm sure it was just K.C.  
Everyone: K.C.?  
Raye: Uh, my giant tarantula my Uncle Rick gave me when I was seven...  
Ameoba Boy: Giant? How giant?  
Raye: Um, well....let's see...he weighed about 228 lbs, 6 oz last time I checked....  
(Everyone whimpers and edges closer. The flashlight begins to dim and flicker fitfully.)  
Max: Oh shit...  
(The flashlight batteries die and everyone screams in terror as a hairy leg touches Heaven's shoulder......)  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
If walkin' potatoes scare you, you shouldn't have read that last part.  
And about the tarantula, I did have one when I was seven, but his name was Dusty and he died when I was eight, so don't worry. I really don't have giant spiders walkin' around in my "Pit of Lost Souls".  
And, sad but true, I don't own Cardcaptors, Clamp does.  
Sorry if it's redundent, but I have to say it so I don't get sued.   
Don't wanna get sued.   
Nope.   
Don't wanna.  
  
"I'm sorry, Chere`! 'E insisted to see you!" Ranea called out in warning as Ranea was pushed into the room by an irrate Tom, who was being "stopped" by the young maid.  
"That's okay, Ranea. It's nice to have visitors." Sakura said politely. Ranea took her hands off Tom's shoulders and smoothed her apron.  
She took and deep breath and shot a look at Sakura. "I'll be waiting outside if you need me, Chere`."  
"Take a seat, Tom." Sakura said, nodding towards the ornate seat in the corner. Tom ignored the offer and sat by the bed at the more comfortable chair, where Li usually sat.  
"I'm most sorry for barging in like this, Madamoiselle Sakura, but I 'ad to see you, and I never could. Are you okay? I 'eard you were injured last week."  
Sakura smiled as she edged away slightly from the very cute boy. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine now. I've just got a sprained ankle. Doctor says to stay off it for a while is all."  
Li walked in just then, shuffling through a magazine (he had been out shopping with Jacque). He stopped in his tracks at the sight of Tom.  
"You!" They both said at the same time, glaring hatefully at each other. "What's he doing here?!" Again, both of them, shouted loudly.  
"Tom, this is Li, Li this is Tom."  
"We've met." Li said coldly, glaring at Tom with the look he normally reserved for Kero and Tori.  
"We 'ave, yes."  
Sakura laughed nervously. "Yeah, well, Li, be nice!"  
"Excuse me, Madamoiselle, but why is 'e 'ere?" Tom asked, not tearing his eyes from Li.  
"Li is my friend from Japan. He's staying here with me and Grannie Marie. He helps me out, since I can't get out of bed."  
Tom glared at Li. "I see. Are you a couple?"  
"You could maybe say that." Sakura said carefully. Li nodded and went to the other side of Sakura's bed to sit on his cot.  
Li glanced at Sakura, then over to her Sealing Wand necklace laying on the dresser as if to ask, Where's Kero?  
Sakura shrugged.   
"So, Madamoiselle Sakura-"  
"Sakura. Just call me Sakura."  
Tom smiled slightly. "Sakura. Well, I suppose I better get back 'ome. It t'was goo' to see you again, and you too, Li." Li glared coldly at him. "Goo' day."  
And Tom left the room, Li mentally urging him out as quickly as possible.  
Kero floated into the room not even a moment later, sniffing happily at a large, chocolate-frosting-covered muffin he was clutching in both paws.  
"Kero! Where did you get that?!?"  
Kero jumped back in surprise, dropping the muffin, but managing to catch it again before it hit the floor. He growled softly, his vein twitching. "What'd you do that for? You nearly made me drop it!"  
"Does Cooky know you got that?"  
"Of course not! I got it when she wasn't looking!" Kero said with a sniff, as though the answer was obvious. He took a giant bite of the muffin, burying his face in the frosting. When he resurfaced, his face was black and very gooey-looking.  
"Get better manners, Kero!"  
"Hmmph, schrumph, hmmmm, yummmmm!"  
  
  
Heaven: Is it gone?  
Psycho: It tried to drag Ameoba Boy off, but it hit its head on a pipe and ran off yelping...  
Sakura: Do I smell something cooking?  
Ameoba Boy: Hey, where is Max?  
Raye: I'm not sure, but we're gonna find out!  
(Everyone crawls out of the "Pit of Lost Souls" and into the sunlit upstairs.)  
Heaven: Oh....my.....God....Max......what ....are.....you...doing?  
(Max is huddled over the stove, which has a burner lit, and is holding a shoe over the flame.)  
Max: Nurishment! Food! Vitals!  
Raye: MAX! DON'T SINK THAT LOW!  
(Raye and Max begin to wrestle over the burning shoe.)  
Raye: It's one of my Dad's loafers!  
Max: It's made of a cow! Cows are eatable!  
(Max is tied to a chair to keep her away from the shoe, which she was trying to take a bite out of.)  
Raye: We've sunk to an all time low.....  
Psycho: You know what, Raye? This'll sound pathetic, but.....that shoe's looking pretty tasty..... 


	14. Sakura In Paris ch.15

Sakura in Paris  
Part Fifteen: The Invitation  
  
  
Raye: Put down the shoe, Chris.  
Psycho: But, I'm so ..... hungry!  
(Raye grabs Ameoba Boy's elephant gun and aims it at Psycho.)  
Raye: I won't let you do that to yourself, Chris! Put it down....NOW!  
(Psycho drops the shoe like it's red-hot.)  
Ameoba Boy: Food! Food! I need FOOD!  
(Begins crawling into the living room as though in a barren desert, and, what do ya know, the living room does turn into a neverending barren desert....)  
Ameoba Boy: I'll find food if it kills me!  
(Crawls under the long couch.)  
Ameoba Boy: FOOD!!  
(Remerges with a dusty cheeto, and promptly stuffs it in his mouth.)  
Ameoba Boy: Yummmmmmmm......  
Max (Extremely disgusted): Eww...  
Heaven: I wouldn't be talking, Fluffy. You just tried to eat a fried loafer.  
Raye: I'm gonna try to get the next part of the fic written while I still have the strength...  
(VERY loud stomach grumble....)  
Everyone: Uhhhhhhhhnnnnnn.......  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
(A girl is walking on a beach, when she trips over a bottle. She picks it up and pulls out the message inside..)  
Girl (Reading aloud): Save us! We have no food or cash, and we're starving to death. If you read this and discover it's too late for us, please send this fanfic to as many people you can and dedicate it to our brave memories, because we, at the very end, refused to eat walking potatoes and broiled shoes. Signed, Raye Firearrows, author of fanfics, but not the owner of Cardcaptors. P.S.- Tell Clamp we said hi.  
  
  
Sakura leaned unsteadily on her right leg, making sure to keep as much weight as she could off of her left ankle.  
"Try to put some weight on the ankle." Li said. Sakura nodded and leaned tentively on the ankle. With a small gasp of pain, she fell forward.  
Sakura opened her eyes in surprise. Li had caught her before she hit the floor, and she was now on her back, in his wonderful arms {Awwww (^_~).}.   
Li leaned closer to her and tightened his hold on her. "Are you okay?" he asked in a breathless way. Sakura nodded numbly.  
Kero walked into the room, licking a large, chocolate-coated spoon. He stopped in mid-lick and groaned.  
"You two can stop trying to eat each other's faces now."  
Sakura pulled away from Li and blushed. "You should have knocked before barging in like that."  
Kero shrugged, slitting his eyes in an evil way at Li. "The door was wide open. Oh, I almost forgot. Sakura, you got a letter."   
Kero pulled a small white envelope out of seemingly thin-air (no doubt using magic) and handed it to Sakura. Li set her onto the floor as she opened the unlabled envelope.  
  
Dear Sakura,  
I am quite taken with you, to be utterly truthful, and I would like to be able to meet and talk with you in private sometime soon, alone. If you would like, and when you feel better, you can come over to my home anytime, and we can have a friendly chat together. Please contact me as soon as you've made a decision. I am hoping to see you again very soon.  
Signed,  
Tom Guvera (Your neighbor)  
  
"The nerve of that guy!" Li fumed angrily. "When he already knows me and you are a couple!"  
"I'm not so sure about that. I haven't had my say in that matter." Kero growled darkly. Li returned the glare with his usual promptness.  
"You don't have a say in that matter, Stuffed Animal!"  
"I AM NOT A STUFFED ANIMAL!!!!" Kero screamed angrily, diving at Li. The two quickly began World War III, battling across the room in the background while Sakura thought of her decision about the invitation.  
A bomb exploaded, filling the room with a bright red light and blowing Sakura's hair around like crazy. She sighed and stuck her right foot out.   
Li tripped and landed with a thud on the ground, Kero begining to laugh like a maniac. "Are you okay, Li?" Sakura asked tonelessly as she re-read the letter.  
"Why did you do that?!?! I almost had the Stuffed Animal beaten!" Li exclaimed angrily, his face turning beet-red.  
Sakura calmly waited until his explosion was over and took a deep breath. "I did that 'cause I don't want you two fighting, and because you were both ANNOYING ME!!!"  
Li blinked. "Sorry I asked."  
"So are you going to this guy's house?" Kero asked innocently as he struggled to lift a large anvil above Li's head.  
"I don't think I really want to. First of all, Tom doesn't strike me as the nicest guy, secondly, I just don't want to, and thirdly, my ankle's still shot."  
"I'll buy that last one." Kero said with a grunt, beating his tiny wings and straining with the anvil.  
Li crawled over to Sakura's side just as Kero dropped the anvil, taking her hand in his. "Are you just doing this because you don't want to make me mad? Or do you really not want to go over to that guy's house?"  
Sakura grinned in her sweetest way. "I really don't want to go, Li. That's all."  
Kero had two teardrops hanging from his eyes and he sniffled pathetically. "I was so close!" He stared sadly down at the giant, anvil-shaped hole in the floor, when Ranea's screech reached their ears.  
"Almighty Lord!!!!! What the 'ell just 'appened!?!?! Where did this anvil come from?!?!?!?"  
  
  
(The Blair Witch is humming happily, sitting in front of a giant, REALLY giant, iron cauldron that is sitting in the middle of the kitchen, a large wood-fire blazing underneath it. The cauldron has a very heavy lid on top, but steam is still escaping.)  
Blair Witch: Yum....It's almost done....  
Li: What's cooking?  
Blair Witch: A new recipe of mine, Andrew La` Fricasse.  
Ms. Sinic: You mean....Ameoba Boy is.....being cooked?!?  
Blair Witch (Nodding happily): Yep!  
(Everyone screams and pulls the lid off the cauldron.)  
Raye: We do NOT eat people in this house!  
Max: Ameoba Boy? Ameoba Boy? Can you hear me?  
Ameoba Boy: This hot-tub feels real nice!  
(Everyone's sweat drops.)  
Raye: Uhhh...Ameoba Boy....  
Ameoba Boy (Innocently as he scrubs his back with a loofa {He's in swimming trunks. I'm not that disgusting...}.): Hmm?  
Psycho: Cousin Blair didn't put you in a hot-tub...  
Sakura: She put you in a giant pot...  
Li: Because she wants to...  
Raye: Eat you!  
(Ameoba Boy stares with really big eyes for a moment before screaming girlishly and jumping straight into the air and out of the pot. A giant hole appears in Raye's ceiling as Ameoba Boy breaks through it.)  
Blair Witch (Pouting as she tosses her giant spoon into the cauldron): Someone trys to do something nice to help some friends out, and what thanks do they get? 


	15. Sakura In Paris ch.16

  
  
Sakura in Paris  
Part Sixteen: Heart Attacks  
  
Raye: Ameoba Boy, get dressed or something....  
Ameoba Boy: Fine! (Wraps a giant yellow and pink blanket around himself.)  
Psycho: Sorry to tell you this Raye, but I hear a sawing noise.  
Sakura: Me too!  
Raye: God help me,....What now?  
(Raye, Ameoba Boy, Psycho, and Sakura walk into Raye's brother's room, who is the original "Brat".)  
Raye: Max, where did you get that jigsaw?  
Max: It was in the shed. Hold it still Heaven! You don't want you hamburger to be uneven do ya?  
Heaven: Hurry up! I'm starving!  
(Everyone sweat drops as Max finishes sawing away at a hamburger drawing on the wall of the room. The piece of brown wood breaks away from the wall, and Heaven scoops it up.)  
Heaven: Yum! It's not McDonalds, but it'll do! (Tries to take a bite out of it, but Max snatches it away.)  
Max: I get the first bite! (Chomps down on the wood.)  
Max: AHHHH!!!!! SPLINTERS! SPLINTERS IN MY TONGUE!!! HURTING! HURTS, HURTING!!!  
(Raye unplugs the jigsaw and sighs.)  
Raye: We're gonna spend the next hour or so pulling splinters from Ms. Max I'm-An-Idiot's tongue......  
Max: OWWW! OWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOWOW!!!!!!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
I don't own Cardcaptors. Clamp does.  
Have to say it so I don't get sued.  
Getting sued is bad.  
Bad.  
Very bad.  
Bad.  
Don't wanna get sued.  
Nope.  
Don't wanna get sued.  
Nope.  
Don't wanna get sued...  
Heaven: This'll take a while. Join us in an hour or so.  
  
  
"Madame` Marie? Are you sure you're feeling okay? You don't look too well." Jacque asked worriedly as he handed the glass of seltzer water and Marie's medication to the elderly woman.  
She sighed and swallowed the pills. "I'm fine Jacque. Just feeling a little peckish lately...."  
"Madame` Marie, I'm most sorry to bother you like this, but I 'ave a request to make!" Ranea said angrily as she stomped up, her maid's cap askew and her apron rumpled.  
Marie hid a smile. "And what is your request, Ranea?"  
"Tell that jerk Tom to stop calling on Chere`! 'E's getting out of 'and! You and I both know that Sakura 'as no interest in 'im, not with 'er and Li together, and 'e poses a threat to them both! If you don't stop 'im now, I'm afraid 'e'll get violent! 'E's tried to force 'is way in three time now!" Ranea cried out in one breath.  
Marie chuckled dryly and nodded. "I will tell 'is father to talk to 'im. Thank you for your concerns, Ranea. You may return to your duties now."  
Ranea stomped off, still very angry with "that jerk Tom".  
Marie sighed and reached over to her bed-side table to set her glass of seltzer water down when a fit of racking coughs overtook her.  
"Are you okay, Madame`?" Jacque asked in a very concerned way as she gripped the bed's edges for support. She regained her breath and managed a small smile as she reached up to her heart with a whithered hand.  
"I'll be fine....."  
  
Sakura sighed happily and leaned her head against Li's shoulder. They were both sitting in her bed, and Li was reading her an old fairy tale.  
Li blushed slightly and shut the book. "Are you sure you want me to read this to you?"  
Sakura nodded sleepily. "I like it when you read to me. And Cinderella's my favorite fairy tale."  
Li smiled softly and reopened the book.  
Sakura's heart was beating faster and faster. Being so close to Li often had that effect on her, and she was starting to like it. Like it a lot....  
Li's heart was beating as well, skipping beats often when he looked down at Sakura's peaceful face. She looked like a sweet doll right there.  
Sakura drifted off to sleep, her heart and Li's beating in rythm with each other.  
  
Sakura awoke with a start. Something wasn't right....  
She swung her legs out of bed and reached for her crutch, being careful to not wake Li, who was sleeping quietly in his cot.  
Sakura hobbled downstairs, the large house silent. It was so early, not even Cooky or Jacque were awake yet.  
A faint light shone from Grannie Marie's room. Sakura frowned. What's she doing awake this early? She needs her rest.  
Sakura knocked gently on the door-frame. "Grannie Marie? Are you okay? Grannie-" Sakura gasped.   
Grannie Marie was crumpled on the floor, her heart-medication bottle clutched in a frail hand, pills spilled all around her.  
"Grannie!!!"  
  
Li awoke at Sakura's scream. "Sakura!"  
He raced downstairs to find an awful scene.  
"Grannie! Grannie! Wake up! For God's sake, wake up!" Sakura cried as she hugged her barely-breathing grandmother to her.  
"What's going on?!" Jacque asked breathlessly as he entered the room.  
Li looked up from the tearful Sakura.  
"Call an ambulance! Grannie's had a heart attack!!"  
  
  
Raye: You can close your mouth now, Fluffy.  
Max: It till hurths too much.  
Ameoba Boy: Then you shouldn't try to eat dry-wall again.  
(Max gives Ameoba Boy The Glare.)  
Ameoba Boy: Shutting up now.  
Psycho: Good idea....  
Raye: So we're sure there's no food in the entire house?  
Heaven: There isn't unless you've a hidden freezer somewhere...  
Raye: How did all my food disappear like that?  
Max (Wearing spectacles with her hair in a bun, dressed like a teacher and holding a pointer. A screen and blackboard appear out of nowhere, and everyone falls into strange chairs. Max coughs.):Ahem, well, you see, Raye, my research has shown that this house is badly infected with mice, ants, and walking potatoes. All of those organisms have to consume food and nutrients to survive, and your ample supply of chips, cheese, and bread were perfect for their appetitites.  
Raye: Let me get this straight.....Mice and bugs and stuff ate all my food?  
Max (Looking down the bridge of her nose at Raye): That is what my research suggests. That, and the possibility that Psycho and Sakura just had a major urge for the munchies...  
(Everyone turns on a nervously giggling Sakura and Psycho.)  
Sakura: Ha ha, that's a good one, Fluffy. Like we'd eat all that food....  
Li: It is possible....  
Psycho: Um, well, who's up for a game of Scrabble?  
(Everyone advances menacingly on a gulping Psycho and Sakura....) 


	16. Sakura In Paris ch.17

Sakura in Paris  
Part Seventeen: The Hospital  
  
(Psycho and Sakura are hanging from the ceiling, tied together tightly, gags stuffed into their mouths, dangling above the giant cooking pot Ameoba Boy had mistaken for a hot tub. Everyone {except the Blair Witch} is dancing around the pot, dressed like Indians...)  
Ameoba Boy (Whooping like an Indian): Time for some home-cooking!  
Psycho: Ummmmminggggg!  
Sakura (Nodding vigorously): Umm humm!  
Blair Witch (Walking into the living room): Raye, what's going on?  
Raye: We're gonna have a stir-fry!  
Blair Witch: I thought you told me we don't eat people in this house?  
Raye: Changed my mind. Hunger can do that to someone.....  
(A sudden Tarzan yell startles everyone as a guy dressed in a loin-cloth swings in and saves Psycho and Sakura.....)  
Everyone but Psycho & Sakura: CHRISTOPHER?!?!?!?  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Don't own crap...  
Well, actually, I do own Jacque, and Grannie Marie, and Ranea, and Jerky Tom...  
But I don't own Sakura or Li! _  
Don't sue me,  
or you shall  
DIE!!!!!!!!  
  
  
  
Li touched Sakura's shoulder gently. She looked up and smiled softly.  
"Is she going to be okay?"  
Sakura nodded and looked down at her sleeping grandmother. "The doctors say she'll be just fine after a day or so."  
"Are you going to be okay?"  
Sakura smiled wider. "Have I ever not been okay?"  
Li frowned slightly. "Yes," he said ever so softly, Sakura barely hearing him.  
  
Flashback:  
Li struggled to stand, leaning heavily on his sword. With a small groan of pain, he fell to the ground again.  
"Li!!" Sakura screamed, struggling to break through the cage to reach the fallen boy. Li groaned and stirred slightly, but didn't try to stand again.  
"Don't leave me Li! Don't leave me alone!!"  
The Clow Card laughed dryly, an evil, horrible laugh. "Are you afraid, little Cardcaptor? Do you feel the terror?"  
Sakura struggled to see through her tears, her anger suddenly flaring up. "You evil card! How dare you hurt Li?!?!"  
The outburst from the trapped girl seemed to increase the Card's amusement. The card doubled up, laughing evilly.  
"Do you really think you have a chance against me, girl?!? Do you think you can really defeat me without your precious Li and wand?"  
Li blinked slowly. "Her precious Li?" he whispered in disbelief before falling into blackness.  
Sakura's tears increased. "You'll pay for hurting Li!!!"  
"Sakura! Catch!"  
The black, shadow-like Clow Card spun about in surprise as Madison's voice rang out in the silence. Sakura's Sealing Wand flew through the air, coming to rest just a few inches away from the cage Sakura was trapped in.   
Sakura scooped the wand up, anger burning in her emerald eyes. "Now you'll pay, Clow Card!"  
"Terror Card! Return to your power confined!"  
The Clow Card screeched as it was sucked into the card. Sakura barely stopped to catch the card before rushing to an unconscious Li's side.  
"Li! Wake up! Don't leave me!!!"  
End of the Flashback.  
  
Grannie Marie's eyes opened slowly to find Sakura, Li, Ranea, and Jacque clustered around her bed.  
"Madame` Marie! 'Ow are you feeling?" Ranea asked softly.  
Marie smiled gently. "As well as can be expected."  
"The doctors say you just had a minor heart attack, Grannie. They say you'll be out of here in no time." Sakura said.  
Marie smiled again. "When can I 'ope to leave?"  
"The doctors say in a week. They want to keep you under observation for a while." Jacque said quietly.  
Marie nodded. "I want all of you to go back to the mansion and run things until I get out."  
Jacque frowned. "I am not leaving you alone, Madame`! The others will be okay on their own."  
Marie nodded slowly. "It'll be good practice for them. They shall 'ave to take care of themselves in the future."  
Li, Sakura, and Ranea left the hospital room, leaving Marie and Jacque alone.  
Jacque sat by Marie's bedside, and took her hand in his. "I was so worried about you, Marie."  
Marie smiled gently. "Don't be, Jacque. I'll always be 'ere for you."  
  
  
Raye: And just what are you on, Christopher?  
Christopher (Dressed normally): Nothing, Ange. I got an anonomous phone call from someone saying that friends of Raye's needed help, so I swung right over. Now, why exactly were you trying to eat Psycho and that other girl?  
Raye (Laughing nervously): Um, well, uh, we're out of food!  
Christopher: Was that all?  
(Everyone nods guiltily.)  
Christopher: Well, my Dad's having a barbecue right now, and there's plenty to eat. Would you guys like to-  
(Blinks and stares at the empty room.)  
Christopher: Come? I'll take that as a yes... 


	17. Sakura In Paris ch.18

Sakura in Paris  
Part Eighteen: House Care  
  
Psycho: Umm! Yumm! Shrumpph!  
Ameoba Boy: These burgers are really yummy!  
Raye: A heck of a lot better than dry-wall, walking potatoes, dusty cheetos, and shoes!  
(Everyone nods in agreement. Christopher's dad stares at everyone as his barbecue disappears.)  
Christopher: Well, seeing as how everyone's together for the moment, why don't we play some games?  
Blair Witch: I know! Hide and Seek in the woods!  
(Everyone looks nervous.)  
Christopher: Uhhh, no. I was thinking more along the lines like video games and cards.  
Ameoba Boy: Yeah! That sounds like fun!  
Psycho: Let's play strip poker! Hey, Chistopher's Dad, do you wanna play?  
(Flutters eyelashes at the stunned guy.)  
Dad: I think not.  
Raye: I'm playing The Legend of Dragoon! I get first dibs!  
(Everyone stampedes into the house, except for Sakura who's still eating a hamburger.)  
Sakura: Yum! These are really good! You're a good cook, Mr. Christopher's Dad!  
Dad (Blushes): Um, thanks!  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Let's do a toss-up!  
Heads, Clamp owns Cardcaptors,  
Tails, I do!  
(Silence as coin flips)  
Awwwww! No fair!  
Heads!  
  
  
Sakura stood, surveying the giant basement with her hands on her hips. She shook her head, tisking. "Nope! This won't do! We'll have to clean it from top to bottom!"  
A dirt-streaked Li, rumpled Ranea, and thoroughly burnt and blackened Kero groaned.  
Li had already cleaned out the shed, stepping onto a rusty rake and having a giant flower pot fall on his head simultaneously, and was not looking forward to cleaning the one area of the house that should be labled, "Condemned".  
Ranea had been washing clothes with the a veritable army of maids, along with the curtains, drapes, towels, table cloths, sheets, and bed-covers. Her hands felt as though they would be permently wrinkled for all eternity.  
Kero had tried to clean the main chimney in the kitchen, with disasterous results. First of all, he became wedged in between two loose bricks, then swallowed more than enough soot and ash to last a life-time, and then Cooky started the fire. Poor Kero had shot out the top of the chimney, screaming and crying, speeding into a large clothes-line full of sheets with a flaming tail, singeing several of them and throughly pissing Ranea off.  
"Oh, come on! Cheer up! Think of how happy Grannie Marie will be when she comes home from the hospital and finds the place spotless from top to bottom?"  
"Chere`, why don't you do some work?" Ranea asked wearily.  
Sakura grinned and pointed down at her bandaged ankle and crutch. "Sorry! I can't on doctor's orders!"  
Everyone groaned as the way-too-hyper Sakura pushed mops, buckets, and dust rags into their sore arms.  
  
That night at dinner:  
Ranea fell asleep halfway through the first course, dropping her forehead into her bowl of clam chowder.  
Li blinked and yawned up until the main course, when he promptly fell over, snoring, into his steak.  
Upstairs, it sounded as though there was a thunderstorm and several explosions going on, most of them coming from Sakura's room, where Kero was sleeping in her sock drawer, blowing the drawers open and close with his snores.  
Sakura grinned cheerfully as she finished the last of her meruingue pie and pushed her chair in.  
"We only have a few more rooms to clean tomorrow, guys!"  
Everyone groaned in their sleep as Sakura hobbled upstairs, an new spring in her step.  
  
"Why is she doing this to us?" Li asked tonelessly the next morning. It was lunch time and Sakura had given everyone ten minutes to rest and relax. Li, Ranea, and Kero were in the Garden, sitting on the swing and trying to choke down their cold sandwhiches and pudding. Even Kero couldn't stomach their usually delicious food after such hard work.  
"Chere` is worried over Madame` Marie. She is venting 'er worry out by forcing the rest of us through 'ell and beyond." Ranea said just as tonelessly, yawning widely.  
Li sighed. "I suppose we'll just have to deal with it for now."  
Kero watched uninterestedly as a column of giant ants carried away his sandwhich. "I don't know about you two, but I'm gonna keel over if this goes on much longer!"  
  
Grannie Marie smiled as Jacque helped her up the spotless steps into the cleanly- shining house. "Why, the 'ouse is so clean!"  
A row of half-asleep servants stood in the front hall to welcome the Madame` home, all of them yawning and blinking wearily. The only one not asleep was Sakura, who hobbled over excitedly to embrace her grandmother.  
"I'm so glad you're home, Grannie Marie!" Sakura said.  
Grannie grinned down at her granddaughter. "It's nice to see the 'ouse so clean, dear, but is everyone else okay?"  
"Of course they are, Grannie!" Sakura said cheerfully. Everyone struggled to look fine, but failed miserably. A loud snore echoed through the room, and Ranea struggled to awake a dozing Li.  
Grannie hid a smile. "I see!"  
  
  
Raye: No! Nononononono! Don't die on me Gerad! I'm so close to the third level!  
(Gerad dies and Raye screams angrily, throwing the controller away.)  
Raye: I don't like this game anymore!  
Christopher (Retriving the poor controller.): Oh, I don't know. It's pretty fun to me.  
(Beats the entire game in five minutes.)  
Christopher: See? Raye? Are you okay?  
(Raye's eyes are blood-red and she's rising up slowly behind Christopher with clawed hands.)  
Raye: DIE! YOU'RE NOT FUNNY! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE THAT GOOD!  
(Begins choking the poor guy.)  
Ameoba Boy: That's a nice change.  
Heaven: What is?  
Ameoba Boy: For once, I'm not the one being choked by the Wicked Witch of the Wes-  
(Begins gagging as Raye starts choking him.)  
(Everyone else sighs as Ameoba Boy and Christopher go purple.)  
Max (In a weary voice): On the count of three. One.....Two.....Three.  
(Everyone heaves and pulls Raye off of Ameoba Boy and Christopher.)  
Psycho: Remember your cholesterol, Raye.  
Ameoba Boy (Hoarsely): Yeah...And those anger management classes...  
Raye: One breathe in, two breathe out, three breathe in, four breathe out....... 


	18. Sakura In Paris ch.19

Sakura in Paris  
Part Nineteen: Kidnapped!  
  
Psycho: It's your deal, Li.  
Sakura: I got a pair!  
(Everyone's sweat drops.)  
Li: Sakura, dear, we haven't even started another game yet.  
Sakura (Laughing nervously.): Oh yeah, right.  
(Everyone sweat drops again. A sudden scream startles everyone. Li and the others drop their cards as they jump in fright and Raye's Gerad dies again.)  
Raye: AHHHHH!!!! I'M GONNA KILL WHOEVER MADE GERAD DIE!!!!  
Voice downstairs: Oh my God! Tell me you're really Mark McGrath! From SugarRay! Please tell me you're really here and not on tour!  
(Everyone sweatdrops.)  
Christopher's Dad: Um, no, I'm not Mark McGrath. I'm Don Roese. And you are?  
Voice Downstairs: Aly! Aly Bomhold! Pleased to meet you, Mr. McGrath!  
(Everyone sweatdrops again.)  
Angie: DA BOMB! GET YOUR ASS UP HERE NOW!!!  
Da Bomb: Coming!  
Raye: Why'n the Hell are you here?!?  
Da Bomb: I've got a message from your Mom.  
Raye: And why did she call you?  
Da Bomb: She tried the house but no one answered and the answering machine didn't pick up, so she called me! (Turns out, the machine had exploaded with over-use {Raye doesn't like to answer the phone when she's relaxing.}.)  
Raye: And the message is?  
Da Bomb: She and your Dad are starting home today! They'll be home in two days! Oh, and to pick up your bro from your Grandma's. Raye? Are you okay?  
Raye: Oh, SHIT!!  
(Everyone leaves the room and Da Bomb blinks at the dust filling the empty room.)  
Da Bomb: Now we'll have more time alone, Mr. McGrath!  
(Christopher's Dad's sweat drops.)  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Okay, listen up, girls and boys!  
(Begins pacing before a line of worried girls and boys in military uniforms.)  
I'm gonna make men and women out of you!  
Girl (Tentively raising her trembling hand): Sir?  
What?  
Girl: Do you own Cardcaptors, Sir?  
No! Clamp does! Anymore questions? (Devil Glares at the group. The nervous kids shake their heads furiously.)  
Good! Begin the fic!  
  
  
Sakura yawned boredly and then looked back down at her pocket manga. She was so bored, sitting on her window seat and reading mangas. And alone. Everyone else had gone on a major shopping spree, and it was Sunday afternoon, so all of the servants and maids had the afternoon off, and the mansion was completely empty.  
Kero was sleeping on her bed, arms thrown around everywhere and snoring uproarishly, when the loud slam startled both of them.  
"Grannie Marie? Li?" Sakura called in a fearful voice, reaching for her crutches and the Sealing Wand necklace, sitting on her bedside table.  
Kero growled as the intruder entered the room. "Get out of here!"  
The intruder snickered dryly. "I've waited long enough. You'll come with me, Sakura."  
Sakura let out a scream as the intruder advanced on her, smacking Kero aside and into the dresser, slamming the drawer shut and locking Kero inside. Sakura struggled to escape as the intruder grabbed her arm and pulled her along after him, down the stairs and out of the mansion.  
"Sakura!" Kero cried, smashing against the unrelenting drawer.  
"Kero! Help!!"  
  
Grannie Marie set her cane against the staircase and helped Ranea carry the large bag of groceries inside. "Li, why don't you go ahead upstairs and see what Sakura's doing?"  
Li nodded and ran up the stairs eagerly.  
But when he reached Sakura's room, he found quite an unwelcome reception.  
Kero battered against the drawer door, gritting his teeth angrily. The thick wood had yet to even begin to crack.  
Li opened the drawer to have an extremely irrate Kero fly into his face. "Where is he?!?! Where's Sakura?!?!"  
"Calm down, Kero! What do you mean "where's Sakura"?"  
Kero panted and glared at Li, debating on whether or not to tell the Brat. He sighed in defeat I've got to save Sakura, and I can't do it on my own. I'll have to trust him.  
"Sakura's been kidnapped."  
Li's blood froze in his veins. "Kidnapped?!? By who?!!?"  
"Tom."  
  
  
Okay, I know that last part was beyond pathetically short, but I've got more important things to worry about!  
Ameoba Boy: Yeah! Like saving all of our necks and cleaning this place up before the Witch's parents show up.  
Raye: Don't try me right now, Ameoba Boy. (Growls warningly and Ameoba Boy quickly become a mime and takes a Vow of Silence.)  
Psycho: Me and Cousin Blair are taking off! We'll be back with Sakura and Li and Raye's bro in a sec!  
(The four leave to pick up the "Brat".)  
Raye: Max, help me pull these boards off the windows. Then we have to repaint the one wall the Lizzie broke through with her sledgehammer, and then we have to clear up and re-wall where you cut through the "Brat's" wall, and find some cash, and quick, too!  
Heaven (Begins crying at the thought of everything they have to do in 2 days.): Are we gonna die??!!?  
Max (Sighs and nods solemnly.): Yes, yes we are, Heaven.  
Heaven: WAHHHHH!!!! I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!!!  
Raye: THEN GET WORKING! NOW!!!!  
(Group begins working as though driven by burly slave drivers.)  
Christopher: I'm putting the pots away.....  
(No one notices him, too busy struggling to knock down the brick covered front-door opening...) 


	19. Sakura In Paris ch.20

Sakura in Paris  
Part Nineteen: Kidnapped!  
  
Psycho: It's your deal, Li.  
Sakura: I got a pair!  
(Everyone's sweat drops.)  
Li: Sakura, dear, we haven't even started another game yet.  
Sakura (Laughing nervously.): Oh yeah, right.  
(Everyone sweat drops again. A sudden scream startles everyone. Li and the others drop their cards as they jump in fright and Raye's Gerad dies again.)  
Raye: AHHHHH!!!! I'M GONNA KILL WHOEVER MADE GERAD DIE!!!!  
Voice downstairs: Oh my God! Tell me you're really Mark McGrath! From SugarRay! Please tell me you're really here and not on tour!  
(Everyone sweatdrops.)  
Christopher's Dad: Um, no, I'm not Mark McGrath. I'm Don Roese. And you are?  
Voice Downstairs: Aly! Aly Bomhold! Pleased to meet you, Mr. McGrath!  
(Everyone sweatdrops again.)  
Angie: DA BOMB! GET YOUR ASS UP HERE NOW!!!  
Da Bomb: Coming!  
Raye: Why'n the Hell are you here?!?  
Da Bomb: I've got a message from your Mom.  
Raye: And why did she call you?  
Da Bomb: She tried the house but no one answered and the answering machine didn't pick up, so she called me! (Turns out, the machine had exploaded with over-use {Raye doesn't like to answer the phone when she's relaxing.}.)  
Raye: And the message is?  
Da Bomb: She and your Dad are starting home today! They'll be home in two days! Oh, and to pick up your bro from your Grandma's. Raye? Are you okay?  
Raye: Oh, SHIT!!  
(Everyone leaves the room and Da Bomb blinks at the dust filling the empty room.)  
Da Bomb: Now we'll have more time alone, Mr. McGrath!  
(Christopher's Dad's sweat drops.)  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Okay, listen up, girls and boys!  
(Begins pacing before a line of worried girls and boys in military uniforms.)  
I'm gonna make men and women out of you!  
Girl (Tentively raising her trembling hand): Sir?  
What?  
Girl: Do you own Cardcaptors, Sir?  
No! Clamp does! Anymore questions? (Devil Glares at the group. The nervous kids shake their heads furiously.)  
Good! Begin the fic!  
  
  
Sakura yawned boredly and then looked back down at her pocket manga. She was so bored, sitting on her window seat and reading mangas. And alone. Everyone else had gone on a major shopping spree, and it was Sunday afternoon, so all of the servants and maids had the afternoon off, and the mansion was completely empty.  
Kero was sleeping on her bed, arms thrown around everywhere and snoring uproarishly, when the loud slam startled both of them.  
"Grannie Marie? Li?" Sakura called in a fearful voice, reaching for her crutches and the Sealing Wand necklace, sitting on her bedside table.  
Kero growled as the intruder entered the room. "Get out of here!"  
The intruder snickered dryly. "I've waited long enough. You'll come with me, Sakura."  
Sakura let out a scream as the intruder advanced on her, smacking Kero aside and into the dresser, slamming the drawer shut and locking Kero inside. Sakura struggled to escape as the intruder grabbed her arm and pulled her along after him, down the stairs and out of the mansion.  
"Sakura!" Kero cried, smashing against the unrelenting drawer.  
"Kero! Help!!"  
  
Grannie Marie set her cane against the staircase and helped Ranea carry the large bag of groceries inside. "Li, why don't you go ahead upstairs and see what Sakura's doing?"  
Li nodded and ran up the stairs eagerly.  
But when he reached Sakura's room, he found quite an unwelcome reception.  
Kero battered against the drawer door, gritting his teeth angrily. The thick wood had yet to even begin to crack.  
Li opened the drawer to have an extremely irrate Kero fly into his face. "Where is he?!?! Where's Sakura?!?!"  
"Calm down, Kero! What do you mean "where's Sakura"?"  
Kero panted and glared at Li, debating on whether or not to tell the Brat. He sighed in defeat I've got to save Sakura, and I can't do it on my own. I'll have to trust him.  
"Sakura's been kidnapped."  
Li's blood froze in his veins. "Kidnapped?!? By who?!!?"  
"Tom."  
  
  
Okay, I know that last part was beyond pathetically short, but I've got more important things to worry about!  
Ameoba Boy: Yeah! Like saving all of our necks and cleaning this place up before the Witch's parents show up.  
Raye: Don't try me right now, Ameoba Boy. (Growls warningly and Ameoba Boy quickly become a mime and takes a Vow of Silence.)  
Psycho: Me and Cousin Blair are taking off! We'll be back with Sakura and Li and Raye's bro in a sec!  
(The four leave to pick up the "Brat".)  
Raye: Max, help me pull these boards off the windows. Then we have to repaint the one wall the Lizzie broke through with her sledgehammer, and then we have to clear up and re-wall where you cut through the "Brat's" wall, and find some cash, and quick, too!  
Heaven (Begins crying at the thought of everything they have to do in 2 days.): Are we gonna die??!!?  
Max (Sighs and nods solemnly.): Yes, yes we are, Heaven.  
Heaven: WAHHHHH!!!! I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!!!  
Raye: THEN GET WORKING! NOW!!!!  
(Group begins working as though driven by burly slave drivers.)  
Christopher: I'm putting the pots away.....  
(No one notices him, too busy struggling to knock down the brick covered front-door opening...) 


	20. Sakura In Paris ch. 21

Sakura in Paris  
Part Twenty-One: The Last Night  
  
  
Raye: Checklist! Let's see what all's done. Walls?  
Alex (Wearily): Check.  
Raye: Floors?  
Heaven & Ameoba Boy: Check.  
Raye: Ceilings?  
Sakura and Li: Check.  
Raye: Dusting?  
Max: Check.  
Raye: Clothes?  
Christopher (Still trying to pull a clinging sock out of his hair): Check.  
Raye: Dishes?  
Psycho & the Blair Witch: Check.  
Raye: Great! It's all done!  
Heaven: Except for two minor details.  
Raye: What?  
Heaven & Max: WE STILL DON'T HAVE ANY FOOD OR MONEY!!  
Raye: That could be a problem......  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
Raye's bumperstickers.....  
Got Anime?  
I'm With Stupid And Stupider.  
Do I Look Available?  
My Best-Friends Are Wak.  
Clamp Owns Cardcaptors, I Do Not.  
  
  
"So you're sure you don't want to turn Tom in to the police?" Kero demanded angrily. It was the next night, and Sakura, Li, and Kero were sitting out in the Garden. Kero was furious that Sakura and Li had decided to not turn Tom in.   
"But the scum-bag deserves some time in prison!" Kero yelled, his vein popping out like usual.  
Li sighed, then grinned at the mental picture of Tom the last time they had seen him. "Using practically all of the Clow Cards on him and completely humiliating him is revenge enough. God, the looks on his face were priceless!"  
Sakura nodded happily. "Oh, Grannie Marie told me some good news!"  
Li and Kero were interested. "What?"  
"Tom must have gone home and told his father about the Clow Cards, because his father thought he flipped and took him to some funky mental hospital to get a head exam!"  
Everyone began laughing like crazy at this. Sakura stopped suddenly, somber. She turned sadly to Li.  
"I just realized. We leave tomorrow. Or summer vacation is over in a week," she said in a tearful voice. Li sighed and looked down at the cobble-stone Garden path-way.  
"I'll miss Jacque and Ranea and the others." Li said softly. He turned and looked at Sakura. "And all the time alone with you, Sakura."  
Sakura smiled faintly. "But we can still be together when we get home, Li."  
Li grinned. "Really?"  
"Of course!"  
"Then I suppose we should make it official." Li said formally. Sakura stared at him as he turned to her slowly. "Sakura, will you go out with me?"  
Sakura stared at him for a moment in mock stiffness. "I really don't know, Li. I'm not sure if you're my type of guy."  
Sakura giggled at Li's downcast face. "Of course I will, Silly! Do you think I'm crazy or something?!"  
Kero groaned and flew towards the open balcony window. "I hate it when they kiss!"  
  
Grannie Marie smiled as she looked through the porch windows at the sweet couple. "Ah, young love! Such a wonderful thing!"  
Jacque grinned and came to stand beside her, his hand resting lightly on her arm. "Old love isn't something to dismiss either, Marie."  
And Grannie Marie's grin widened.  
  
Ranea sighed wistfully and looked down at Li and Sakura from her own balcony window. "They're too lucky."  
"Are you okay, 'Nea?" Jean asked as he knocked on the open door frame.   
Ranea grinned as he walked over to stand with her on the balcony.  
"Just fine, Jean."  
"Jealous of them?"  
"Somewhat."  
"You know you don't 'ave to be." Jean said slowly. Ranea grinned and threw her arms around his neck.  
"You are a sly one, Romeo!"  
  
Kero groaned. "Is everyone kissing, or is it just me?! I'm gonna find some food. Yum! Food! My one true love!!"  
  
  
  
How was that part? Sorry to say, y'all, but SIP is almost over!  
I know!  
I'm in tears, too!  
Christopher (Covered in dirt and wearing a miner's hat): I don't think there's buried Indian gold under this house, Raye. Why don't you just baby-sit some kids or something to get some cash, like normal girls?  
Raye (In a deadly quiet voice.): Are you implying that I'm a normal girl, Chris?  
Christopher (Backing away fearfully.): Of course not, Raye! I'll get right back to work now!   
(Dives back into the "Pit of Lost Souls".)  
Raye: And who is THE Bomb?  
Voices in Raye's Head: You are!  
Raye: I know. 


	21. Sakura In Paris ch. 22

Sakura in Paris  
Part Twenty-Two: Home at Last  
  
  
Raye: SUCCESS!!!!  
(The group is standing (some are on the ground, passed out in exhaustion) before the manically laughing Raye, who is holding a $100 bill. Everyone is dirty, tired, and about ready to kill Raye....)  
Max: Now that we found the money, went shopping, rebuilt your house, spent three weeks in your company, and watched the Mummy twenty-three times, can we go home?  
Raye: Maybe. (Kisses the $100.) I love you, Bill.  
Ameoba Boy (Whispering to Sakura.): She's totally flipped. She named it Bill.  
Raye: Did you say something, Ameoba?  
Ameoba Boy: Of course not, Raye!  
Raye: Good!  
(Psycho suddenly comes into the room. She was on the lookout for Raye's parents.)  
Psycho: They're here!  
(Everyone stampedes out the back door, Raye waving happily by the door as they pass.)  
Raye: Bye! Thanks for coming! Hope you enjoyed your stay at the Barry Inn! Good Bye!!  
(Raye's parents walk in to find Raye, Alex, Max, Heaven, Li, and Sakura sitting calmly in the spotless living room, drinking root-beers and watching the Mummy. They stare in disbelief at the spotless house and non-fighting kids.)  
Mom: Did you guys have fun?  
Raye (Looking up absently.): Sure. Nothing much happened though......  
  
{Disclaimer}  
And now, for the final Disclaimer and grand finale!  
(Raye steps onto the silent, spot-lighted stage, dressed in a tux.)  
Raye: Ahem. I'd like everyone to be silent. Maestro? Drum roll please.  
(Drum roll begins.)  
Raye: Now I want complete silence.  
(Complete, awaiting silence as Max and Heaven wheel in something like a board, covered with a velvet cloth. Raye waits dramatically before pulling the cloth off.)  
Raye: Ta da!  
The board reads:  
Thank You All For Reading This.  
Raye Does Not Own Cardcaptors. Clamp Does!  
Let's Give A Round Of Applause For Those  
Talented Ladies!  
(Everyone claps as Raye bows.)  
Raye: Thank you all! Goodnight!  
  
Sakura and Li boarded the plane, waving goodbye to Grannie Marie and the others, who were all in tears.  
"Goodbye, Chere`!"  
"'Ope to see you soon!"  
"We love you both dearly!"  
"Visit us again soon!"  
  
After a long, grueling plane ride, Kero was extremely green, and Li didn't look too much better. Sakura on the other hand, bounced out of the plane and down the stairway to hug Madison and her Dad.  
"It's good to see you both again!" Madison exclaimed. She had a very dark tan, for once, and was wearing a large cowboy hat. She was, for once again, without one of her many cameras.  
"So how are things between you and Li?" Madison whispered as a blushing, stammering Li had his arm shaken off by a relieved Sakura's Dad.  
"I'm so glad you were there to help Sakura through the rough time when Grannie had her heart attack! And for being able to go with her so she had another friend from home."  
"What's that Thing doing here?" Tori said suddenly, appearing from the crowds.  
"Oh, Tori! Li here went with Sakura to Paris!" Sakura's Dad said cheerfully.  
Tori glared angrily at Li.  
Li, Tori, and Kero could probably all tie in a glaring contest. Sakura sighed inwardly.  
"I didn't know the Brat went to Paris with Squirt." Tori growled through gritted teeth.  
"Well, he did. Be nice, Tori!" Sakura retorted back. She turned back to Madison.  
"Yeah, me and Li are great. Guess what? We're going out." Sakura whispered, careful to not let Tori or her Dad hear.  
"WHAT?!?!" Madison screamed, jumping back.  
Tori and the others, including everyone in the airport, stared at the now sweatdropping Madison. "Ooops. Sorry about that."  
She leaned closer to Sakura. "Truthfully?!? Really?"  
Sakura nodded, quite uneasy by Madison's outburst. "Try and keep it down."  
"Oh shoot! And the one time I had to forget my camera!"  
  
That night, after dinner, Sakura went up to her room to unpack.   
As the suitcase top sprang open, Sakura first noticed the small white envelope lying on top of her clothes.  
Opening the letter, Sakura pulled out the paper.  
  
Dear Sakura,  
We all really enjoyed your stay in Paris, and even though there were rough times, we'd love to have you back next summer, if it is okay with your father. You are most welcomed to bring Li again. Write to us as soon as is humanly possible and give us your reply.  
P.S.- If you would like to bring somewhere else along with Li, you are most welcomed to. Just write and tell us!  
  
Love from Paris,  
Grannie Marie, Jacque, and Ranea   
  
Sakura set the letter down and picked up the phone. After two rings, Li picked up.  
"Hello?"  
"Li? It's me, Sakura."  
"Hi, Sakura. What'd you call for?"  
"Are you free next summer?"  
  
That's it! It's over! Well, that doesn't mean I can't have a sequel, does it?  
Mom: I'm still suspicious. The house is almost too nice. Let's go on a check, Ron.  
Dad: Agreed.  
(The two begin going through each room, looking for messes. Raye and the others follow.)  
Mom: This room looks okay.  
(Shuts the door to Alex's room. As the door closes, the walls cracks and paint chips off.)  
Dad: This one too.  
(Shuts the door. The shelves immediately fall down.)  
(Everyone returns to the living room.)  
Mom: Well, I still don't quite believe it, but everything seems in perfect order. Good job, kids!  
Raye: Oh, it was nothing. It's not like we had anything else to do. (Winks.)  
  
Acknowledgements and Apologies:  
I'd like to thank everyone who appeared in my story, and apologize for any embarrassment caused. I hope everyone knows it was just for fun. Well, most of it anyway. I'd like to thank Lauren and Heather, for helping me through tough parts and giving me ideas. Thanks to all my friends for all of the inspiration, and I'd like to say that I don't own diddly-squat from any animes. I just like to write fanfics. I even apologize to some of my not-so-friends I included in this. If any of you read this, sorry. I had to vent my anger, frustration, hate, and loathing for you somewhere, though. If you were offended by any of this, sorry again. I hope you know it's just for fun. Well, most of it anyway. I'd also like to apologize to Ms. Sinic, Max, and others who had to suffer and wait for each new installment. I'm glad that some people like my crappy writing, or at least say they do.  
Thanks everyone! Oh, and Psycho, Chris, Amanda. This one's for you.  
Love to y'all!  
From Raye Firearrows.  
The author formally known as Angie B.  
  
ANIME ROX!!!! PEACE OUT!!!!! 


	22. Sakura In Paris ch. 10

Sakura in Paris  
Part Nine: Discovery  
  
Raye: Party! Party! Party!  
Max: Everyone celebrate and sing along with me!  
Everyone (In harmony): Ding-dong, the witch is gone! Which old witch? The wicked Witch! Ding-dong, the Wicked Witch is gone!  
Da Bomb: I know we're all glad that I'm still free and the Lizzie's behind bars, but we need to work to clear my name and ruin Kassie's! I know she was the one that killed Kyle!  
Psycho: Oh my God! They killed Kyle!  
(Blair Witch and Da Bomb comfort a sobbing Psycho.)  
Da Bomb: It's okay Chris! You'll find another to obsess over....  
Psycho: But....But....but Kyle was ......Kyle!  
Raye: If we're gonna prove Da Bomb's innocence and convict Kassie, we're gonna need some more help....  
Max & Ms. Sinic & Raye: And we know just who to call!  
Ameoba Boy: You'll have to excuse us while the cackling hags call more help. Meanwhile, enjoy the next par-(Starts gagging)  
Raye (Smiling sweetly as she chokes Ameoba Boy): Oh, Ms.Blair! Are you still hungry?  
  
  
{Disclaimer}  
  
And now, a message from Poet Psycho...  
(Enters the stage, dressed in french outfit)  
Ahem. Roses are red, violets are blue,  
I miss you so much Kyle, I do!  
Raye don't own Cardcaptors, Clamp do!  
Oh, boo hoo hoo hoo hooooooooooo!  
Thank you.  
(Bows and leaves the stage amid slight applause.)  
  
  
"I'm sorry Missueir Tom, but Madamoiselle Sakura has retired already. She is not to be disturbed." Jacque told the wistful Tom. "I'm sure you can call on 'er later."  
At that moment, Sakura and Li were sitting on the swing in the Garden, sleep being the last thing on their minds.  
"How long have you had feelings for me, Li?"  
"I'm not sure. Sometime before the day you caught the Freeze Card."  
Sakura giggled.  
"What's so funny?"  
"It's the same with me!"  
  
Back at the house....  
Kero was asleep, floating a few feet above Sakura's bed and snoring softly. He was so deep in sleep, he didn't even notice the sound of approaching footsteps, or the sound of the door-knob turning, or the creak as it opened.  
"Almighty Lord! What is that thing?" Ranea exclaimed as she stepped into the room.  
Kero snored gently and turned on his side. "Yum....cake...."  
Ranea armed herself with a poker from the fire-place and approached Kero slowly.  
Kero rolled over again as Ranea prodded him with the poker. "Ummm...the new Xylon Warriors game.....pancakes......"  
Ranea poked him again. He turned to his other side, mumbling about bathtubs of maple syrup.  
The girl was thoroughly angry now. She grabbed the flying (actually, floating) mouse and shook him.  
"Wake up!"  
"Ahhhhh! Save the pop tarts!" Kero screamed. He stopped in mid-scream and his eyes grew wide as he realized who had awaken him.  
"Uh oh. Um, uh, you're, uh, you're....dreaming! That's it! You're dreaming! This is all just a dream! You're really not seeing me! I'm not real!"  
Ranea pinched Kero on the cheek.  
"OUCH! Why'd ya do that?"  
"To make sure I wasn't dreaming."  
"You're supposed to pinch yourself, not someone else!" Kero yelled angrily.  
"What is going on in 'ere?" Jacque asked as he entered the room.  
"You're dreaming! Both of you are dreaming!"  
"I think not Missueir! Or Madamoiselle. I'm not quite sure what you are."  
"I'm Kero! Guardian of the Clow! Sakura's partner! I am not a Missueir or Madamoiselle, whatever those are! And, I AM NOT A STUFFED ANIMAL!!!!!!!"  
Ranea and Jacque blinked in surprise, their hair blown back.  
"Excuse me." Jacque said quietly as he fell backwards, unconscious.  
  
  
Do ya like it? Do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya do ya......  
Everyone: SHUT UP!  
Ameoba Boy: Guys! Check out the news! (Turns up the volume)  
Announcer: And we've just recieved this bulletin....It seems that in the prison section of Zellers Institute for the Mentally Insane, a prisoner has escaped. Authorities say her name is Alyssa Bomhold, age 14, 5 ft. 4, who currently attends Washington High School, who is convicted for first-degree murder. Her victim was one Kyle Something-or-other, age 15, who also attended Washington School. Authorities say she is mentally insane and highly unpridictable, as well as a chronic liar. She escaped after managing to unlock her cell, killing two guards and rendering another unconscious. She also thoroughly angered the warden, blew up over half of the Institute, and released over 237 prisoners. If this girl is seen, please contact the Institute at 876-5432, and give any imformation you can. And in the Stock Markets- (Tv turns off.)  
Max: Uh oh....  
Raye: We're...  
Ms. Sinic: Thoroughly..  
Ameoba Boy: And royally...  
Everyone: SCREWED! 


End file.
